Bet you think Holy Rollers use snakes in church too.
Two things you need to do ~ learn something about Christianity, and secondly, get a cage for your mongoose.
Actually, as a 'recovering born-again Christian', I know more about it than you'd think. I've personally ,et some of the biggest names in born-again Christianity, and I am sad to say that for every Billy Graham there are 5 or 6 hucksters, making it up as they go along.
I'll never forget Creflo Dollar asking people to come up and leave $$$$ at the feet of the preacher whose church he was guest-speaking at, or Kenneth Copeland telling the story of how God told him to buy a million-dollar airplane and then how his congregation made it happen.
True, not all evangelicals believe the earth is 5000 years old. I've seen John Haggee bend over backwards to demonstrate that BOTH the Bible is literally true AND the earth could have had a billion-year history BEFORE Adam and Eve.
So stupid. So very, very, stupid.
If you're offended by my tag line, so be it. The most violent, abusive, individual that I have ever had the misfortune to be associated with (yes, its an ex-wife, you guessed it!) was a Bible-thumping, holier-than-though born-again Christian (OBTW, did you know that she is the only perfect Christian on planet earth? No? Well that's the impression she'd give you. And if you disagreed and tried to discuss it with her, you just might find your mouth meeting her fist.)
And you know what is even more bizarre? She had an IQ of 150 and worked in the medical field (ie had a scientific background). So she was so F-ed up on so-many levels, with so many contradictions, someone could probably write a 500-page case-study just on her!
As far as evolution goes, I'll just say that Pope John Paul The Great's statement on the subject is one I agree with.
And, as an aside, I would suggest you look into one of the two wings of the real church (ie. Catholic or Orthodox). I'm not saying that all Protestants believe in heresies, mind you, but as far as the current crop of American evangelicals, well....if the shoe fits....
Quit dismissing the YEC's.
They are not strawmen.