What really caught my attention last year was when the teacher contacted me and told me my son had punched a child. She didn't see it, so there wasn't anything that could be done about it; the other child told her the day after it happened. I talked to my son about it and he said the other child pushed him, he pushed back, the kid pushed again, and my son punched him. We've always taught the boys, walk away from words, if they touch you, have at it. We will never get after them for self-defense. My son is a very fun loving, easy going child. We were all shocked to learn he hit this kid, but hey, we know he listens.
When my daughters were in elementary school a boy kept trying to kiss one of them. I told her that if he did it again to punch him and for all three of them to beat the crap out of him. He tried and they did. The embarrassment of getting whipped by three girls made him stop. BUT he came over with his brother (about 12 years old) who complained to me. I told him that his brother needed to stop or else the beatings would continue and to go away and send his parents over if there was anymore to be said. Never heard from any of them again.