Posted on 09/07/2006 7:26:59 AM PDT by Hydroshock
I always keep a resume up to date.
Like duh!!!!!
My dad was once hired as a branch manager for a forklift rental company before they fired the guy he was replacing.
After he was hired, a couple weeks went by and my dad began his first day on the job. On this day, my dad's new business cards arrived, and they read "Branch Manager." The about-to-be-axed-but-didn't-know-it-yet Branch Manager called my dad in and said "Your business cards are here but there's a problem, there is a misprint." Dad looked at the cards, saw that his name was spelled correctly and said "They look OK to me." The branch manager had no idea, and thought they were bringing in my dad to be a salesman.
I don't exactly recall how this situation resolved itself, since I haven't heard this story in a while, but suffice it to say my dad was not happy that the owner didn't have the stones to fire the Branch Manager before he arrived to take the manager's place.
My dad also once worked for a guy who had a routine that he never broke. If you were getting promoted, he would take you out to lunch and then tell you about your promotion over lunch. If you were getting fired, he would take you out to breakfast.
If the boss asked you to go to breakfast, you may as well skip it and start cleaning out your desk.
This movie read like a manual of corporate America these days.
I myself was asked to train the Koreans who were taking my job through outsourcing.When a plant I was at moved to Mexico in 1996, I was offered two severance packages. One was "normal", the one if I agreed to stay until released and spend time training in Mexico was ridiculously high. >:)
It's likely that the only good thing Howard Metzenbum ever did was push through the "WARN" act, which requires two months notice (or pay in lieu) of a closing, move, or "major" layoff.
-Eric
Decided to wait at the coffee pot and fire the one who came by first.
*Groan* Sally showed up.
Tried to be diplomatic so I said, "Sally, I'm afraid I either have to lay you or Jack off."
She gave me the strangest reply.
I had a boss that went on vacation .The very next day his boss came in and told everyone that "Jim " had been fired and introduced us to his replacement.
Two weeks later Jim walks in on Monday morning ,nobody had bothered to mention it to him .So I was the one that had to him "I thought you were let go" He ran off to his bosses office and then stormed out ,never to be seen again.
A little off topic I have heard the best why are you late for work story.
A divorced guy I worked with bought what was really a very nice house but in a terrible neighborhood.His thinking was he is almost never home and he bought the place for a pittance.
Well one day he came out to go to work and found a police car in front of his house with crime scene tape around his car ,It turns out a junkie had sat down next to his car shot himself up and died leaning against the rear fender of his car with a needle still stuck in his arm.
He wanted to get a broom and knock the guy over so he could go to work but the cop wouldn't let him until the coroner came.
So he had to call the boss and say to him "Boss I'm gonna be late cause there's a dead junkie on my car"
At another job, after the death of a dear coworker, an upper management guy who had feuded with my boss and the deceased coworker, unceremoniously showed up one day while we were still grieving and tried to boot us out. Our customers were aghast. I was given the option, which I had to take, I needed to keep working, of training my replacement. Luckily, she got pregnant, and I had extra time to find new work during her leave, and train her assistant, all the while working with the 'new' boss, a man who knew he was putting me out of work, whose kids attended school with my son. And by the way, my replacement was dumb as a board. She just did not get what she was supposed to be doing, 'their' customers often came to me, which ticked off the new boss and he then hired the assistant whom I trained, luckily she caught on more quickly.
When I was a deputy sheriff many years ago, another deputy, after an off duty in uniform OT job, went into a bar and had a couple of beers while still wearing his uniform. He put a civvie jacket on to cover the shirt, but a tavern patron(the deputy had chewed her out earlier)spotted him and complained to the Sheriff.
The next day the deputy was on patrol, and ordered to come to the courthouse. The Sheriff had him strip off his uniform in his office, and while standing there in his underwear, call his wife to come get him, and bring a pair of pants, a shirt, and some shoes.
Now that was rude, but it did cause me to laugh a lot when I heard about it.
Chicago Blackhwaks slid a note under Coach Billy Reay's door.
I'd take the free breakfast, then clean out my desk.
At my wife's old joint, they would lay people off on Fridays at 4PM. Some people started leaving at 3PM on Friday. It really screwed up their system.
The last job beofr ethis one they laid off at 11:00am, if you were in the cafateria at lunch you had a job for another week.
bttt
Indeed.
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