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To: COUNTrecount
Schieffer: I'm really serious about writing songs. They're love songs, with a country-bluesy kind of feel. It's something I do for fun, like some people like to drive race cars or play golf. It's the same way if you play golf, they always say that golf is like a love affair: It's no fun if you take it seriously, and if you take it seriously, it'll break your heart. It's the same way with this. I'm serious about it. It's fun. We'll see what happens, but I'm trying to get someone to record them.

Paging the Ditzy Chicks!
29 posted on 08/30/2006 11:08:11 AM PDT by maggief
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To: maggief


Bob will have to top these titles.

WORST COUNTRY-WESTERN SONG TITLES

The Best of the Worst Country-Western Song Titles (These are *real*)

- Do You Love As Good As You Look?

- Drop Kick Me, Jesus, Through The Goalposts Of Life

- Get Your Tongue Outta My Mouth 'Cause I'm Kissing You Goodbye

- Her Teeth Were Stained, But Her Heart Was Pure

- Here's A Quarter, Call Someone Who Cares

- How Can I Miss You If You Won't Go Away?

- Been Roped And Thrown By Jesus In The Holy Ghost Corral

- I Changed Her Oil, She Changed My Life

- I Don't Know Whether To Kill Myself Or Go Bowling

- I Fell In A Pile Of You And Got Love All Over Me

- I Flushed You From The Toilets Of My Heart.

- I Keep Forgettin' I Forgot About You

- It's Hard To Kiss The Lips At Night That Chew Your Ass Out All Day Long (By THE NOTORIOUS CHERRY BOMBS)

- I Wanna Whip Your Cow

- I Would Have Wrote You A Letter, But I Couldn't Spell Yuck!

- I Wouldn't Take Her To A Dawg Fight, Cause I'm Afraid She'd Win

- I'd Rather Have A Bottle In Front Of Me Than A Frontal Lobotomy

- I'm Just A Bug On The Windshield Of Life

- I've Been Flushed From The Bathroom Of Your Heart

- I've Got The Hungries For Your Love And I'm Waiting In Your Welfare Line

- If I Can't Be Number One In Your Life, Then Number Two On You

- If Love Were Oil, I'd Be A Quart Low

- If My Nose Were Full of Nickels, I'd Blow It All On You

- If The Phone Don't Ring, Baby, You'll Know It's Me

- If You Don't Leave Me Alone, I'll Go And Find Someone Else Who Will

- If You Leave Me, Can I Come Too?

- Mama Get The Hammer (There's A Fly On Papa's Head)

- May The Bird Of Paradise Fly Up Your Nose

- My Every Day Silver Is Plastic

- My Head Hurts, My Feet Stink, And I Don't Love Jesus

- My John Deere Was Breaking Your Field, While Your Dear John
Was Breaking My Heart

- My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend, And I Sure Do Miss Him

- Oh, I've Got Hair Oil On My Ears And My Glasses Are Slipping Down,
But Baby I Can See Through You

- Pardon Me, I've Got Someone To Kill

- She Got The Gold Mine And I Got The Shaft; She Got The Ring And I
Got The Finger

- She Made Toothpicks Out Of The Timber Of My Heart

- She's Got Freckles On Her, But She's Pretty

- Thank God And Greyhound She's Gone

- They May Put Me In Prison, But They Can't Stop My Face From
Breakin' Out

- Velcro Arms, Teflon Heart

- When You Leave Walk Out Backwards, So I'll Think You're Walking In

- You Can't Have Your Kate And Edith Too

- You Can't Roller Skate In A Buffalo Herd

- You Done Tore Out My Heart And Stomped That Sucker Flat

- You Were Only A Splinter In My Ass As I Slid Down The
Bannister Of Life

- You're The Reason Our Kids Are So Ugly


30 posted on 08/30/2006 12:05:43 PM PDT by COUNTrecount
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