Critics flee "CLerks" Screening

New York Post ^ | 7/19/2006 | Richard Johnson

[cyborg]

The first Clerks was great. I knew this one was going to stink.

[Texas Eagle]

In the scene that sent Siegel to the exit, the characters graphically discuss hiring a woman to perform sexual favors on a donkey. Siegel told Page Six: "It was so foul and mean and repulsive. I finally realized I could not say anything positive . . . I wasn't ready for this kind of smut . . . I hope he doesn't make any more movies."

Sounds like a cleaned-up episode of South Park to me.

[andyk]

Wait - Joel Siegel found a movie he didn't like?! Stop the presses!

[garyhope]

Gee, what Joel Siegel says is really, really important to me. I follow his every word and suggestion. He's my "go to" guy for all my cultural advice.

[cmsgop]

No, If Critics Leave thats a Good Thing, You think they Loved Team America?

[cripplecreek]

"First movie I've walked out of in 30 [bleeping] years!"

Delicate sensibilities?

[Rodney King]

Sounds to me like it is going to be good.

[msnimje]

Is 30 Bleeping years the same as 15 Bonking years?

[SFC Chromey]

I wonder if he would have walked out of Blazing Saddles?

[Reaganesque]

"I don't need Joel Siegel to [bleep] my [bleep] the way he apparently [bleeps] M. Night Shyamalan's, gushing over his flick ['The Lady in the Water'] before he's even seen it, but [bleep] man, man - how about a little common [bleeping] courtesy? You never, never disrupt a movie, simply because you don't like it. Cardinal rule of moviegoing: Shut your [bleeping] mouth while the movie's playing.

"I don't come down to your job and slap the taste out of your mouth for coming up with a line like, ' "Shark Tale" Is a Halibut Good Time' - so don't [bleep] with my stuff while it's still screening . . . What are you, a 12-year-old boy cutting loose with your pals at a Friday night screening of 'Scary Movie' 4' while your parents are in a theater down the hall watching 'The Devil Wears Prada'? Leave the diva-like behavior and drama-queen antics to the movie stars, not the movie reviewer, ya' rude-ass [bleep]."

What a class act Mr. Smith is. He questions Seigel's emotional age but ends up revealing his own.

[-=SoylentSquirrel=-]

This Kevin Smith fellow is quite articulate in his clowning of Mr Siegal:

"...This is a guy who seemingly prides himself on his own nyuk-nyuk wordplay. For 'Pirates 2,' he made us all titter with 'Yo, Ho, Ho and a Bottle of Fun' . . . He made us squeal with delight when he wrote, 'Wheelie Good Time for "Cars." ' I mean, Fozzy [bleeping] Bear laughs at this guy."

And there's more: "I don't need Joel Siegel to [bleep] my [bleep] the way he apparently [bleeps] M. Night Shyamalan's, gushing over his flick ['The Lady in the Water'] before he's even seen it, but [bleep] man, man - how about a little common [bleeping] courtesy? You never, never disrupt a movie, simply because you don't like it. Cardinal rule of moviegoing: Shut your [bleeping] mouth while the movie's playing.

"I don't come down to your job and slap the taste out of your mouth for coming up with a line like, ' "Shark Tale" Is a Halibut Good Time' - so don't [bleep] with my stuff while it's still screening . . .

[Dinsdale]

If this tool of the MPAA doe'nt like it it must be good.

He likes everything (that his masters tell him to like).

[rod1]

Who needs script writers when you have these Shakespears.

[Sonny M]

Joel Siegel has always been a bit of a publicity hound.

[xarmydog]

He should have went to Mexico for some 'sensativity'training,prior to the film review.The real deal is coming to a town near you!

[Sybeck1]

Smith's movies have been terrible since "Dogma". And G4 calls him an "icon"?

[citizencon]

Movie critics are not opened-minded. They have an acquired taste and an agenda. They're no different from biased news reporters, really.

[M38]

I can't wait to see it!

[jdm]

Last time I heard about a Kevin Smith movie, "What's the Frequency Kenneth" was skipping in my CD player.