I have a gay daughter. She was raised in church and she struggles mightily knowing that God disapproves of her lifestyle. She doesn't really believe that she was born gay, per se, but she cant recall too many instances where she has been attracted to boys. (though there has been a few) What she does have is an incredible, irrational FEAR of men. There were several circumstances that caused this that I wont go into here but I do think that it was trauma that sent her to where she is, and so does she. She hates being attracted to women, claims to me (maybe because I'm her momma) that she's a virgin and counsels her friends that it isn't "cool" or "sexy" that it is actually very difficult to be gay.
Anyways, this rambling is to explain that I truly believe that, for the very most part, some trauma, molestation or incest or ingrained distrust of the opposite sex plays a MAJOR roll in sexual identity, even if the instances cant be remembered. I might would try getting to the bottom of that if I were you.
As complex as homosexuality this above statement basically hit the bullseye on most of the causes behind it. Mpackard you ever think of going into psychiatry?
But even deeper than all the apparent peripheral reasons behind it there is a deep spiritual condition that must be overcome before there's a cure.
The only satisfactory nuts and bolts method that I've heard to successfully overcome this condition can be found here; LINK