Posted on 06/29/2006 1:07:30 PM PDT by rawhide
THANK YOU FOR YOUR NICE WORDS!
Nope, we are not in a base daycare (wouln't THAT be great...they are REALLY CHEAP! and the ones I have seen are VERY NICE!)
My 6 year old is now is school...and my little one (3 years old) is in a home daycare that is run by a woman who is SO AMAZING!
Never more than 3 to 4 kids...and I work with her husband~
My husband is actually a reservist...we didn't live near enough to a base to take advantage of any of the base offerings when he was deployed.
We don't make a ton of money...but we are REALLY FRUGAL and make choices based on keeping our family HAPPY!
Thank you again for your words..
This thread IS AMAZING...
I know what you mean...it just really pisses me off when some people assume that THEY KNOW everyone else's business..
Especially when we worked VERY HARD and VERY LONG to get to a point where I COULD stay home all but 2 days per week..
It was something that was important to me to be able to do..
And, there is not much fat to be trimmed out of this budget......
We DO have Cable and internet.
Husband has a cell phone plan that gets me mine for free..
We COULD cut those things out for sure...But it only saves $100 per month...which although significant would NOT make it so I could stay home FULL TIME.
Additionally, I work for a local high school...so I get the added benefit of having the same schedule as my son...AND I have quite a bit of the summer off!
:-)
Thank you for your words!
(I should LISTEN TO YOU!)
I was a stay at home mom; however, not everyone can be one and calling them all "monsters", actually makes YOU the "monster!
In today's society, people don't usually live near relatives and some relatives should NEVER be anywhere near a baby or a child.
You don't have any children, do you?
It all depends upon WHERE one lives and no, moving is NOT an option, for many people.
That goes for men too. All fertile men and women should stay home, breed, and raise the children. They shouldn't have jobs, and that includes military service. No exceptions. It's for the children. There you go. Problem solved.
Oops, I forgot the sarcasm tag. This sounds too much like the ridiculous arguments people are seriously pushing.
The busybody, HOLIER THAN THOUERS, are bloviating nasties.
We all do what we have to do and should NOT be judged nor questioned; especially by those who don't even have any children, but see themselves as "experts".
Isn't it, though! I tend to laugh off such assinine comments as "Well, when *I* have children..." and "I would NEVER..." - they used to bother the heck out of me. I just know when these "perfect" people live in the real world of parenting, they'll get a hard dose of reality. All in due time, folks, all in due time.... This is a very tragic story, but do we need to have so many FReepers jump on the "all working mothers are selfish evil snobs" bandwagon? Come on, folks. Judge not lest ye be judged....watch yourselves.
I have a neighbor whose kids are a little younger than mine. She was always judgemental about my parenting skills when my son was a teenager. She'd give me poor advice, which I never took. She looked down her nose at me, as though I was raising him all wrong. Now he has a high tech job on a nuclear sub, and her kids are all unemployed, and sucking her dry. She doesn't speak to me anymore.
I meant to include you in #429.
Great story! :-)
"Maybe someone who's not taking the welfare payments you'll bitch about on another thread."
ROFL!! Amen and High-Five to you, man! As a single working mother of three, here, I resemble that remark.
(BTW, beeler, my children *are* my top priority, that is why I am single now, for their safety and that's why I work now, for the food on the table and setting an example of good values in my kids - To you, I am a Monster - To them, I am a Hero. I think I care much more about what my kids think of me, thank you very much.)
I was a stay at home mom. I was fortunate enough to do a very great deal for my child; however, I do know that some mothers aren't in the same position I was and MUST work. I can't fault them for that. They do it because they MUST!
Those who came onto this thread, hijacked it, and then did their best LEFTY/LIBERAL exacerbation of those whom they neither known nor understand their lives AND without having children of their own, needed to be called out....so I did.
I'm sure that you are a good mother, just as I am positive that far too many p;eople here attempt to talk about things they actually know nothing at all about, but love to pretend that they are "experts" in. They need to just keep quiet!
So far, you pass the "Mom test" in my book. But there's more to being a good parent than the things you've mentioned. Answer the following questions, and if you get them right, you can keep your kids.
Sorry, I'm laughing too hard to think of any tough questions.
It depends on where you live. LOCATION, LOCATION, LOCATION. If you are on your own self-contained farm, then the more kids the better, and everyone pitches in.
I was able to stay home with my kids up to a point. After that, we had to move into a larger house. FWIW, we lived in an area where housing is cheap.
My son and daughter-in-law have 4 kids, and they both work full time. A babysitter comes to their house in the morning and in the afternoon their toddler goes to playgroup. Their other kids are all in school.
They would not be able to afford a house in their area if they didn't both work. I'm not talking about a McMansion, but an average, 2000-sq.-ft. house.
What does this have to do with leaving a baby to suffocate in a hot car?
Yup - know that story all too well. My sister-in-law that now has a colicky 3 month old told me just the other day "I'm so glad you're a parent, too, at least you understand." I suppose she's getting judged already, 3 months into it, poor thing.
Andrea Yates was a "stay at home" mom.
My Mom gave me the best parenting advice. "Enjoy the time you have with him. Some day, he'll grow up, and move away. You're going to miss him. Enjoy him while you can." With that in mind, everything else fell into place. She gave me all the usual advice about dealing with colic, bumps and bruises, temper tantrums, etc. Most of that I don't remember anymore. The important things have nothing to do with whether he went to daycare, or had the latest video games. I guess you have to actually be a parent, before you understand what's important. Sometimes, when I close my eyes, I can still hear him say "Mommy, you make the best cookies."
Hey - no need to defend yourself - you're doing the best you can, just let the judgemental know-it-all comments go in one ear and out the other. Until they've walked in your shoes, raised your kids, paid your bills, they have no idea what it takes IN YOUR HOUSE.
BTW, I found that, while still married, that part-time work was the best option. Glad it's working for you! Unfortunatly, you don't fall into the "working mother" club OR the "Stay at home mom" club - so you'll most likely get comments like this from both sides - bottom line is YOUR family, not theirs. Chin-up! :o)
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.