>OK...I just reread your comment. It was about "healthy" wives. But, I think I'll leave my story there anyways. Something tells me that he was as good to her in health as he was in sickness.<
I knew a man whose wife had a stroke when they were in their late 20s. He took very good care of her.
But, I did say "healthy" wives. I have NEVER seen a husband take the kind of babying mommy-care of a wife that I have seen women do many times with otherwise healthy men. Or, as my former father in law would say, "LAURA forgot to pack a tie." Laura didn't wear ties, of course, he did, and she was supposed to take care of the trivial details for him. He supervised 30 people and had a doctorate in chemical engineering, but he wanted "mommy" to pack his ties. Isn't this beyond silly?
Well, it certainly isn't anything I'd do unless my husband asked me to. And I can't imagine him ever asking me to do it. I've never understood how anyone could pack for anyone else other than a child. Even my kids pack their own clothes once they're around eight years old or so. How would one member of a family know what another member of the family wants to wear? Maybe some people don't care what they wear. Beats me.
I guess I never thought of it as "mommying," though. I do know that some women do these things for their husbands out of love in much the same way that my husband does many silly things for me out of love. For many years he brought me a glass of juice while I was still in bed before he left for work. Was he mommying me? No, he was just being kind.
I do try not to belittle the way other couples handle their relationships. My husband and I are pretty non-traditional; I'm a stay-at-home mom, but my husband has always cleaned all the floors and bathrooms. He cooks many of the meals we eat, too. I'll never forget the time my parents dropped in on a Saturday morning not long after we got married and I was still in bed and my husband was cleaning the bathrooms. I was pretty embarrassed, but I believe that was the day he won my parents over, lol.
All that said, if another couple wants to run things in a way that seems strange to me, I try not to let it bug me if it works for them and they are both happy. Sometimes I boast (to my husband) that I've never made breakfast for him in the 21 years we've been married. But, then I sometimes think that it would be cool to do that because it would be a nice gesture and it would shock him. :-)
Candi
p.s. Now that I think of it, I knew a woman many years ago whose husband wouldn't even pour his milk on his cereal in the morning. His wife would put his bowl, cereal, silverware and milk container on the table at his place and once he came, he would wait for her to put the cereal in the bowl and pour the milk on it for him. I don't believe she fed it to him, though. I'll have to admit, *that* bugged me.