According to you, there is no way of knowing the heart and mind of a spouse, which is ridiculous. Lots of people, yes particularly women, see the warning signs but choose to act solely on their feelings. Then they come to the divorce court expecting a judge, who has maybe a few days a best to learn about your case, to make everything right again.
If you were misled by your spouse's character despite knowing him or her for ten years, why do you expect a judge to be able to see through them in three hours?
Do you mean the original incident this thread is based on? Shooting a judge? I agree - that's idiotic.
So, according to you, everyone knows, 100% for sure, what is in the heart and mind of the person they are marrying.
One can know for sure, by observing one's future spouse's behavior, what they prioritize in life.
People don't change all that much unless they get hooked on drugs or suffer a head injury.
Now why don't you start calling women who marry cads fools and idiots, and blame them for their dumb choices?
If a woman started a thread complaining about how the courts don't have sympathy on her because she married a loser, then I would inform that woman that it is her own fault for marrying a loser and that she was stupid to do so.
OOHHH, because he was a cad, and she was an idiot and married him, now suddenly, it STILL HIS FAULT!
If a guy stands up in a church and takes a vow before God that he is not going to cheat on his wife and he does anyway, he is morally responsible for breaking his vow. Plain and simple.
There is no vow that a woman takes not to be a nag, not to be annoying, etc. or most of the other reasons guys give for wanting a divorce.
Adultery is not a personality quirk.
Women, more often than men, marry a bad choice. That's because women have this damnable flaw of always thinking, "I can change him".
I say it's about even. Guys often marry women who are profligates, who are up to their ears in credit card debt, etc. thinking: "Well, when we're married, she'll be more financially responsible." That's a personality trait which is usually obvious way before vows are exchanged and which never changes.