[dighton]

“Is chow allowed in the barracks, Private Ebert?”

“Sir! No Sir!”

“Are you allowed to eat jelly doughnuts, Private Ebert?”

“Sir! No Sir!”

“And why not, Private Ebert?”

“Sir, because I’m too heavy, Sir.”

“Because you are a disgusting fatbody, Private Ebert!”

[tongue-tied]

Private Ebert, you climb obstacles like old people bump ugly!
You're too slow!
You're too fricking slow!
Get off of my obstacle! Get the HECK off of my obstacle!
Get your goll darned bubble gummed body the furp off of my obstacle!