Don't let strangers on a forum get to you.
Last week we buried my aunt. When she was in her twenties she left her physically abusive husband and moved away with her 2 young children.
She hired a live in nanny/housekeeper and worked for many years as an anesthesiologist. She then bought a large home and ran her own nursing home. After that she became a successful real estate broker.
It was difficult for her to do all that on her own, but she had a way of succeeding at whatever she did.
The world would be a boring place if everyone lived their lives according to a prescribed formula.
You definitely know your mother much better than any of us.
He didn't "get to" me; I thought he was kind of a cartoon, but there are limited people out there who can't deal with people who live differently. Fortunately, we don't need their permission or approval to live the lives we wish.
I always thought that was rather American, myself. :)