Prosecutor admits theft of 30,000 buckets

The SCOTSMAN ^ | 26 Apr 2006

[TRY ONE]

Prosecutor admits theft ---

TURKMENISTAN'S former general prosecutor publicly confessed to taking bribes yesterday, begging president-for-life Saparmurat Niyazov for forgiveness in a tearful plea broadcast on state television.

Kurmanbibi Atadzhanova was accused of taking bribes and stealing state property including 25 cars, 36 villas, 2,000 cattle and 30,000 buckets.

"Great Leader, I admit everything, but I beg you to forgive me, don't jail me," she said in a sobbing confession on television. "I have three daughters."

An indifferent-looking Mr Niyazov appeared in the same programme and told Atadzhanova: "You have to return everything you've stolen. The president can't forgive everyone. I just don't understand it. Why do you need 30,000 buckets?"

Mr Niyazov is at the centre of a bizarre personality cult in the isolated central Asian state which has seen a town, months of the year, days of the week and a heavenly body named after him or close relatives.

After he escaped a 2002 assassination attempt, about 60 people were jailed and some made televised confessions after what human rights bodies described as show trials like those of the Stalin era. Atadzhanova, general prosecutor at the time, was in charge of the trials.

This article: http://news.scotsman.com/international.cfm?id=623082006

[TRY ONE]

"Great Leader, I admit everything, but I beg you to forgive me, don't jail me,"

Sounds like a DemocRAT???

[neodad]

A bucket here, a bucket there, and pretty soon you're talking real money.

[nuconvert]

"I just don't understand it. Why do you need 30,000 buckets?"

The question of the day

[Doogle]

LMAO......she wasn't stealing the buckets...she was swiping the trucks to haul em away


Doogle

[Zuben Elgenubi]

"I just don't understand it. Why do you need 30,000 buckets?"

Batting practice?

[The_Victor]

30,000 buckets

Legal tender in Turkmenistan?

[nuconvert]

BTW - how does one steal 36 villas?

[Larry Lucido]

The cars, villas and cattle I can overlook. But don't mess with my buckets!

[SlowBoat407]

There once was a girl from Nantucket
Who got caught stealing 30,000 buckets
I'm sorry, she cried
But they helped me to hide
The theft of millions of ducats.

[RightOnline]

Well ya see......she was offered a bribe and thought the dude said "30,000 ducats".......and, well, there you are.

[ishabibble]

You are obviously a man! When a woman steals "25 cars and 36 villas" she's going to need lots of buckets to keep them clean. I hope she scrubs the prison floors until her hands fall off...thievery is second only to murder when it comes to harming others.

[nuconvert]

LoL.
Good One!

[TRY ONE]

More Info:

"Atajanova's replacement, Mukhammedogly Ogshukov, told the Cabinet that Atajanova also had set up an organized criminal group that blackmailed officials. He said investigators had confiscated $6.2 million, 32 houses, 25 foreign cars, seven trucks and more than 2,000 sheep from Atajanova's family."

So, apparently the "buckets" were worth $ 6.2 million!

[No Truce With Kings]

"I just don't understand it. Why do you need 30,000 buckets?"

A man worked in a diamond mine in the old Soviet Union. Every day he left work with a bucket full of dirt. The guards at the gate would go through the dirt, searching for diamonds or other valuables buried in the dirt -- tools, money, whatever. All they ever found was dirt. "What are you doing with the dirt?" they would ask the man. "I am putting it in my garden," he would reply, "It makes things grow better."

Finally the man retired, the Soviet Union collapsed, and the state diamond mine was sold to outside investors, who actually turned a profit with it, even though workers were being paid more. After a while one of the guards got curious, and went to the old worker's hut out at the edge of town. It looked a lot better than most of his neighbors, and sure enough, he had a huge garden. The ex-guard knocked on the door, and was greeted by the worker.

"I must know," said the guard. "What were you smuggling out in the buckets? It must have been something."

"Well," said the worker, "Since I cannot get in trouble for it anymore, I'll tell you -- I was stealing buckets."

[Hat-Trick]

at least no one can accuse her of not having a pot to piss in.

[Hatteras]

I always heard a similar joke but the guy was toting out wheelbarrows full of dirt.

[No Truce With Kings]

"I always heard a similar joke but the guy was toting out wheelbarrows full of dirt."

What good is a joke if you cannot fine-tune it for the situation?

[Hatteras]

Not being critical at all, mind you. When I read the article, that was the first thing that crossed my mind and I was going to relate the same joke. I'm just glad I scrolled down before I started typing all that out. ;-)

[No Truce With Kings]

"just glad I scrolled down before I started typing all that out."

I did the same thing -- my nightmare is to post a joke like that, only to find that someone else posted the same joke while I was typing my version.