Neither I nor my parents did any of those things. We worked like dogs all of our lives and everything my parents attained, plus a good bit of what I made over the years, was wiped out by catastrophic illness, cancer for my Dad and Alzheimer's for my Mom. This "blaming the victim" crap on FR has got to go.
I suppose there are those, some probably right here on FR, who will blame me or my folks for the situation we found ourselves in, we "didn't save enough", or didn't have the foresight to purchase catastrophic illness insurance, or some such crap. There are some on FR who would probably say, well, tough, it's your choice to care for sick/elderly family, you didn't have to, you could have thrown them out in the cold, or some other social Darwinist claptrap. Well, all I can say is, your time is coming...
I'm sorry to here about your situation. I never said that a person couldn't have "bad luck," rather, I said that "bad luck" is overused. But I have to ask: Why didn't your parents have health insurance or long term care insurance?