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"Do you believe it is possible that a woman who at one point had no problems performing oral sex might, later in life, decide it is disgusting and no longer be willing to do so?

If so, then is it not also possible that a man might at some point in life think nothing of having sex with anything he can stick his part into, but later in life realise that such acts are disgusting and no longer desire to do so?"

Yes, that all sounds reasonable to me. Its just that the gender of people one is attracted to feels so much more fundamental to me than any particular act.

Part of my difficulty here is I can't believe it would be possible to change the gender I am attracted to. I could decide to not be with a woman but I don't think I could change whether I am attracted to a pretty woman.

Part of my difficulty here is I can't believe it would be possible to change the gender I am attracted to.

I think most can understand and relate to what you said above. I certainly can.

Having said that, IMO, what is key to clearly understanding the issue requires that we listen carefully to the experts and read what ex-gays have said about their struggle.

I must stress this point: In no way is this a simple issue to understand. Understanding the issues surrounding homsexuality and former homosexuals require a lot of time and effort. I very much encourage you (and everybody else) to check out the links I've provided on this thread.

I don't think it's a gender that one is attracted to.

If a man dresses up as a woman, he can get other men to be "attracted" to him. Whatever it is that has changed, it isn't his gender, it's simply his "look", and what the other men "think" they are seeing.

OK, you could have simply meant the "look" of a person gender-wise, rather than an actual physical "connection" based on some innate characteristic of gender.

But if a man dressed as a woman performs oral sex on another man, and that other man never learns the truth, has that man had a "homosexual encounter"? Is that man now "gay"?

And if not, would that man be considered gay if, having learned of the deception, he figures out that when it comes to oral sex, if he can simply shut out of his mind certain characteristics, he can enjoy the act regardless of the gender of the person he is with?

OK, in fact the idea of being "gay" seems much more about who you fall "in love" with. But men fall in love with men all the time, and they aren't considered "gay" unless there is some physical sexual aspect to the relationship.