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Mark Steyn - No easy answers on immigration conundrum
Chicago Sun Times ^ | April 9, 2006 | Mark Steyn

Posted on 04/09/2006 2:54:11 AM PDT by Tom D.

No Easy Answers On Immigration Conundrum

April 9, 2006

BY MARK STEYN SUN-TIMES COLUMNIST

Here's my immigration "compromise": We need to regularize the situation of the 298 million non-undocumented residents of the United States. Right now, we get a lousy deal compared with the 15 million fine upstanding members of the Undocumented American community. I think the 298 million of us in the overdocumented segment of the population should get the chance to be undocumented. You know when President Bush talks about all those undocumented people "living in the shadows"? Doesn't that sound kinda nice? Living in the shadows, no government agencies harassing you for taxes and numbers and paperwork.

Go ahead, try it. In Michelle Malkin's book Invasion, she recounts the tale of two fellows who in August 2001 pulled into a 7-Eleven parking lot in Falls Church, Va., in search of fake ID from the illegal-alien assistance network that hangs around there. Luis Martinez-Flores, who'd been living here illegally since 1994, took them along to the local DMV, supplied them with a fake address and falsely certified they lived there. The very next day, the two guys returned with two pals of their own, and used their own brand-new state ID on which the ink was not yet dry to obtain in turn brand-new state ID for their buddies. A couple of weeks later, all four of them used their Virginia ID to board American Airlines Flight 77 at Dulles Airport and plowed it into the Pentagon.

Think about that. From undocumented illegal alien in the 7-Eleven parking lot to lawful resident of the State of Virginia in just a couple of hours. Wow. Say what you like about Luis Martinez-Flores, but he runs one efficient operation.

By comparison, say you've got two kids under 5, and you'd like to bring over a nice English nanny to look after them. Name of Mary Poppins. Good references, impeccable character. If you apply now, there's a sporting chance the process may be completed before your children's children are in college.

Given that the new immigration "compromise" bill retrospectively approves all the millions of people who've been through the super-efficient Luis Martinez-Flores immigration system but without doing anything to improve the sclerotic U.S. government immigration system, maybe it would be better just to subcontract the entire operation to Senor Martinez-Flores and his colleagues. It would certainly be cheaper. The extensive Undocumented American support network manages to run it out of the back of the car from a parking lot without a lot of air-conditioned offices full of lifetime employees on government pensions, and given that the net result is exactly the same people who'd be living here anyway, why not go with the lowball bid? Legal immigrants to the United States can only envy the swift efficient service Messrs. Hani Hanjour and Khalid Almihdhar received outside that 7-Eleven.

All developed countries have immigration issues, but few conduct the entire debate as disingenuously as America does: The president himself has contributed a whole barrelful of weaselly platitudes, beginning with his line that "family values don't stop at the Rio Grande." True. They don't stop at the 49th parallel either. Or the Atlantic shore. Or the Pacific. So where do family values stop? At the Bureau of Citizenship and Immigration Services. If you're an American and you marry a Canadian or Belgian or Fijian, the U.S. government can take years to process what's supposed to be a non-discretionary immigration application, in the course of which your spouse will be dependent on various transitional-status forms like "advance parole" that leave her vulnerable to the whims of the many eccentric interpreters of U.S. immigration law at the nation's airports and land borders.

Here's another place where family values stops: The rubble of the World Trade Center. Deena Gilbey is a British subject whose late husband worked on the 84th floor: On the morning of Sept. 11, instead of fleeing, he returned to the building to help evacuate his co-workers. A few days later, Mrs. Gilbey receives a letter from the INS noting that as she's now widowed her immigration status has changed and she's obliged to leave the country along with her two children (both U.S. citizens). Think about that: Having legally admitted to the country the terrorists who killed her husband, the U.S. government's first act on having facilitated his murder is to add insult to grievous injury by serving his widow with a deportation order. Why should illegal Mexicans be the unique beneficiaries of a sentimental blather about "family values" to which U.S. immigration is otherwise notoriously antipathetic?

How about "the jobs Americans won't do"? Most of them would be more accurately categorized as the jobs American employers won't hire Americans to do -- that's to say, in a business culture ever more onerously regulated, the immigration status of one's employees has become one of the easiest means of controlling costs. I see no reason why this would change, and given that, as a matter of policy, U.S. illegal-immigration law is not enforced by the U.S. government, it's hard to know why private employers should do it.

Meanwhile, U.S. immigration is cracking down on classical violinists. Don't ask me why. Presumably, Brahms' violin concerto falls into the ever dwindling category of jobs Americans will do. At any rate, the Halle Orchestra of Manchester, one of England's great orchestras, has just canceled its 2007 concerts at Lincoln Center. Why? Because all 80 musicians plus the 20 support staff are required -- under new "homeland security" regulations -- to be interviewed personally at the U.S. Embassy in London before each visa can be issued. They can't go en masse on the tour bus: They have to make individual appointments stretched out over several weeks. And they can't go to the local U.S. consulate in Manchester because -- and this detail is worth savoring five years after 9/11 -- the consulate's computers cannot handle the biometric data. The orchestra worked out that in train fares and accommodation it would cost about $80,000 to get the visas and decided it would rather cancel the tour. The good news is that Lincoln Center subscribers don't have to worry about the tuba player having plastic explosives packed down there. The bad news is, if a rogue tuba player ever breaks through the system, Homeland Security won't be able to e-mail his data back to the U.S. consulate in Manchester for a background check.

We're now expected to believe that this system will be able to stop hassling 68-year-old cello players long enough to process an extra 10 million-plus immigration applications, and that furthermore an agency that keeps no reliable records of legal entry into the United States will somehow be able to determine on the basis of utility bills whether this or that undocumented alien falls into amnesty-eligibility category.

Sure, believe that if you want to. It'll be good practice for swallowing the amnesty for the next 40 million circa 2025.

© Mark Steyn, 2006

Copyright © Mark Steyn, 2006


TOPICS: Foreign Affairs; Government; News/Current Events
KEYWORDS: aliens; illegals; immigration; marksteyn
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To: Tom D.

Easy Ans. #1. What does a STOP sign mean? #2. Enforce the law! Those foks who can't bring themselves to serve fully according to their SWORN OATH, should get out of the way. Period! We can get people who will do the job.


21 posted on 04/09/2006 6:00:51 AM PDT by Waco
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To: Tom D.

This article puts the debate in the correct arena.

It is U.S. Immigration Department which needs to be overhauled. Not our laws. The immigration laws we have are not the problem. The problem is that the laws are not being upheld.

That is the fault of our Immigration Department.

No matter how lofty ideals NEW laws might represent, the laws will not be enforced.

Let's get the discussion focused on exactly WHERE our problem lies. It is with our Immigration department their refusal to do their jobs.

Is not immigration under the Executive Branch? I don't know much about it -- but in the next 10 days I am going to know more.

If all 298 million of us starting pointing out the problem, maybe something will be done.


22 posted on 04/09/2006 6:11:57 AM PDT by i_dont_chat (I defend the right to offend!)
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To: i_dont_chat
eeeeeek!

http://www.gao.gov/new.items/d0566.pdf#search='ICE%20immigration'

U.S. Immigration and Custom Enforcement (ICE) is under the Department of Homeland Security.

The Office of Investigations (OI) and the
Office of Detention and Removal Operations (DRO) are subsets which have the responsibility.

There is so much bureaucracy here, it is a miracle that they can accomplish anything.

I wish GWB would grasp the thought that HERE is where he can make his legacy. He could put strong leaders here to enforce the laws on the books -- and save us from all of this partisan fighting. I think a vast majority of both parties want the same thing. WE WANT OUR IMMIGRATION LAWS ENFORCED.
23 posted on 04/09/2006 6:35:12 AM PDT by i_dont_chat (I defend the right to offend!)
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To: Tom D.

...and I guarantee it isn't the first thing that comes to mind!


24 posted on 04/09/2006 6:56:23 AM PDT by wita (truthspeaks@freerepublic.com)
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To: Tom D.
"The president himself has contributed a whole barrelful of weaselly platitudes, beginning with his line that 'family values don't stop at the Rio Grande'."

As one of President Bush's supporters (note tagline), I am disgusted by his weaselly platitudes concerning this issue.

The American people expect such as this from Democrat politicians and their supporters from the Left, who cannot be truthful about their policies and designs and must resort to weaselly platitudes, disinformation, propaganda, and mendacity in order to get elected and to advance their agenda.

However, the American people do not expect such as this from a leader whom they have reason to respect and admire.

25 posted on 04/09/2006 6:56:58 AM PDT by Savage Beast (9/11 was never repeated--thanks to President Bush and his surveillance program.)
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To: Grut

You forgot to mention that Hillary got some press for making it possible.


26 posted on 04/09/2006 7:05:02 AM PDT by wita (truthspeaks@freerepublic.com)
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To: goldstategop
The current generation of politicians care only about their re-election.

Which means it makes absolutely no sense for the Repubs to keep pushing for the legalization of these 11 million.

This voting bloc will never vote R, not as long as they are managed by the commie groups like ANSWER who running this whole charade.

27 posted on 04/09/2006 7:17:24 AM PDT by texasbluebell
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To: Tom D.

Here's another place where family values stops: The rubble of the World Trade Center. Deena Gilbey is a British subject whose late husband worked on the 84th floor: On the morning of Sept. 11, instead of fleeing, he returned to the building to help evacuate his co-workers. A few days later, Mrs. Gilbey receives a letter from the INS noting that as she's now widowed her immigration status has changed and she's obliged to leave the country along with her two children (both U.S. citizens). Think about that: Having legally admitted to the country the terrorists who killed her husband, the U.S. government's first act on having facilitated his murder is to add insult to grievous injury by serving his widow with a deportation order. Why should illegal Mexicans be the unique beneficiaries of a sentimental blather about "family values" to which U.S. immigration is otherwise notoriously antipathetic?




Apparantly, for those whining about "what to do about illegals and their anchor babies," the government already has a solution. Or is there some reason we couldn't do that to illegal invaders while we should do it to LEGAL IMMIGRANTS?


Go ahead FROBL's, tell us why this is a good thing.


28 posted on 04/09/2006 7:33:09 AM PDT by trubluolyguy (C)
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To: i_dont_chat
You Stated: "I wish GWB would grasp the thought that HERE is where he can make his legacy. He could put strong leaders here to enforce the laws on the books -- and save us from all of this partisan fighting. I think a vast majority of both parties want the same thing. WE WANT OUR IMMIGRATION LAWS ENFORCED. "

Yes you are right, except that HERE is where he CAN WILL make his legacy.

If we were to write a performance plan for the President at least 50% of his evaluation would be directly related to this issue. HOMELAND SECURITY.

You suggest he should have appointed strong leaders. Instead he treated it like a pork barrel, handing out high paying jobs to less than fully qualified people.

As a result it is full of fraud and corruption.

His work effort in this area is unsatisfactory and he should be on notice.

:)Easy Does It:)

29 posted on 04/09/2006 7:33:30 AM PDT by eazdzit (Vote AGAINST All CFR, NWO PuboCrats !! CROSS OVER IN THE PRIMARIES!!!)
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To: TalBlack

Which is a direct connection between the porous southern border and the 9-11 attack...not that it matters.




Not to a true FROBL.


30 posted on 04/09/2006 7:37:19 AM PDT by trubluolyguy (C)
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To: Tom D.
From the article:"U.S. illegal-immigration law is not enforced by the U.S. government, it's hard to know why private employers should do it. "

This statement tells us exactly why any form of amnesty will not work without establishing strict enforcement first.

:)EZ Does It:)

31 posted on 04/09/2006 7:41:40 AM PDT by eazdzit (Vote AGAINST All CFR, NWO PuboCrats !! CROSS OVER IN THE PRIMARIES!!!)
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To: Tom D.

I am very seriously considering becoming a one issue voter.

If we don't speak with our votes we will be overrun by the vocal minority.


32 posted on 04/09/2006 8:01:35 AM PDT by cdrw (Freedom and responsibility are inseparable)
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To: cdrw

So, who the H*LL do you vote for? The Rats want illegals because it means more votes. The Republicans want more illegals because it's cheaper for business.


33 posted on 04/09/2006 8:10:34 AM PDT by Richard Kimball (I like to make everyone's day a little more surreal)
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To: FreedomPoster; Howlin; riley1992; Miss Marple; deport; Dane; sinkspur; steve; kattracks; ...
Thanks FP!

Steyn ping!


34 posted on 04/09/2006 8:19:02 AM PDT by Pokey78 (‘FREE [INSERT YOUR FETID TOTALITARIAN BASKET-CASE HERE]’)
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To: Tom D.

My best friend is Ukrainian and working on getting his citizenship and the illegal immigration situation just fires me up after watching all he's had to do to do it "right". Plus it is very difficult for his family to get visas to get to come and visit him-- it's enough to drive me nuts.


35 posted on 04/09/2006 8:49:28 AM PDT by lawgirl (She comes on like thunder and she's more right than rain)
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To: Tom D.

OMG! This needs to be shouted from the rooftops and emailed to every yahoo on capitol hill


36 posted on 04/09/2006 9:17:26 AM PDT by mylife ( The roar of the masses could be farts)
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To: Enduring Freedom

Mr Steyn is has a brilliant mind and is a fantastic jounalist.

Just imagine what the news would be like if so called journalists actually did research and used their minds insted of just parroting one another


37 posted on 04/09/2006 9:21:23 AM PDT by mylife ( The roar of the masses could be farts)
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To: Tom D.
Statement: "Mark Steyn - No easy answers on immigration conundrum"

Response: Then try a hard answer.

38 posted on 04/09/2006 9:24:01 AM PDT by AEMILIUS PAULUS (It is a shame that when these people give a riot)
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To: stopem

Indeed! Lets Roll!

I forwarding this to every rep in Tx


39 posted on 04/09/2006 9:24:57 AM PDT by mylife ( The roar of the masses could be farts)
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To: Grut

Thank you for the link.

Perhaps there is some hope for our system


40 posted on 04/09/2006 9:28:42 AM PDT by mylife ( The roar of the masses could be farts)
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