Lots of girls get their ears pierced when they are babies.
Parents make those choices too.
Also, many parents make choices about plastic surgery on their kids. Kids ears stick out, and the parents get the surgery done to fix the ears.
My daughter has a scar on her forehead. We've been adviced to get surgery on it. Many parents would do the surgery. We've opted to let her decide when she's an adult. Either decision is okay.
The only two forms of permanent body modification that American parents are allowed to make to their child's body are piercing their daughter's ears and cutting off their son's foreskin. Ear piercing is a relatively minor form of permanent body modification compared with male circumcision. If a girl does not wear earrings, the holes usually close up on their own. However, once a boy's foreskin is cut off, he can never get it back again.
Parents are not allowed to tattoo or scarify their child's body or to pierce their child's genitals. Piercing a boy's penis is a less severe form of permanent body modification than male circumcision.
Also, many parents make choices about plastic surgery on their kids. Kids ears stick out, and the parents get the surgery done to fix the ears.
Cosmetic surgery to correct a congenital abnormality, like pinning ears that stick out too far or removing a birthmark, is not the same as cutting off a normal, healthy part of a child's genitals without a valid medical indication.
My daughter has a scar on her forehead. We've been adviced to get surgery on it. Many parents would do the surgery. We've opted to let her decide when she's an adult. Either decision is okay.
It's great that you will let your daughter decide about the surgery. However, cosmetic surgery to remove a scar is not the same as cutting off a normal, healthy part of a child's genitals without a valid medical indication.
Because there is no medical indication for infant circumcision and because a foreskin is not a birth defect, male circumcision is more similar to other forms of permanent body modification (tattoos, body piercing, scarification, etc.) than it is to cosmetic surgery to correct a congenital abnormality or to correct an injury.
Why don't you fix her scar now while she is young and her skin will heal better instead of making her go through life with a big scar on her head. You are the parent, you make the decision, you don't wait until she's an adult. By the time she's an adult it could be too late. Don't make her face her difficult teen years with this problem. You know why many parents would do the surgery, it's because it's the right thing to do.
When my brother was born, he was in NICU for several weeks. Early on, my mother went to visit him one morning. He had a piece of plastic across both sides of his face. My mother asked the nurses what they had done.
They told her they taped his ears back with scotch tape, so they would no longer stick out. They continued with the tape for weeks, then finally removed it. His ears were in their proper place and no surgery was ever needed. It truly worked.
I seriously doubt that any health professional would prescribe scotch tape, today.