[misterrob]

But life is about stages that you go through and experience. And, without some level of maturity and preparedness your risk of hardship increases. Furthermore, the identity you have at 22 is not the one that you will have at 28 or at 34 for that matter. And, for what it's worth, answers that I thought I just knew at earlier stages of life were plain wrong. Pretty common in young men.

In your husband's case, success should be measured in terms of his own accomplishments. Completing boot camp certainly qualifies as a defining moment as does his acquiring rank and other responsibility. From those accomplishments he is better prepared to handle life.

[TexanToTheCore]

Risk is an attribute of life. If you choose a riskless life, you may lose everything or perhaps have a really boring life.

[Kaylee Frye]

Just because your identity changes, does not mean that's a bad thing. Your identity changes a lot when you have kids - sometimes that is very hard on a marriage. Does that mean that people should have kids before marriage so they know how they will change? No, of course not. It means that you should be conscious you will change and conscious that your mate will change when you get married. You should pick a person who can deal with your changes and you should be prepared to deal with their changes. It's all about picking who to get in the fox-hole with. I'm not saying that no one should wait to get married, I'm just saying that if you choose not to wait, that doesn't mean you've made a bad choice.