Whoa! Jack, I think your ball is missing its ping...
If I thought Uncle Joe was my Great Grandpa... 
Why... I'd drink a whole lot more!
#2, the only way you could drink more is to give up sleeping! 
or give up passing out!
What's that? You say you're Stalin's great-grandson? That's okay, kid - change your name; get plastic surgery; move to Nome, Alaska; and become a Carthusian, and no one will hold it against you.
Whoa! Jack, I think your ball is missing its ping...
If I thought Uncle Joe was my Great Grandpa...
Why... I'd drink a whole lot more!
#2, the only way you could drink more is to give up sleeping! or give up passing out!