That leads me to belive that she never got beyond COBOL.
Not that there is anything wrong with COBOL...it's just that in writing COBOL source, you know that at some point you will be printing out a listing that weighs more than your youngest child.
It is such a verbose language and so boring that, if you're like me, you start getting a little creative with your variable names....and file names. I mean really creative. Now, suddenly it's fun to go to work and actually enjoy it. But I'm digressing here and the "COBOL Capers" is a whole 'nuther phase of my life.
If she is still stuck in "COBOL Land" that would explain everything.