I think the public is nervous about large families because the tax payer has to foot the bill in many cases. Free health care, education, food stamps, day care, etc. I have 5 children yet it does take alot of money and time to raise them right. It seems those that can have many children don't and those that shouldn't have many children do.
My father and mother were never rich, but they NEVER went on the public dole. What gets to me beyond anything are those who have children and complain. There are those of us who would love to have the blessing of even having one.
I think you hit the nail on the head. I come from a big family and know they are a wonderful thing. I also know from experience how unbelievably rude and busybodyish people can be about things that are none of their business (such as the size of someone else's family).
On the other hand, I have found myself having to bite my own tongue when told by someone they want to have 10 kids when they have depended on public help to pay the healthcare costs of their family since before they had their first child. It is one thing to have a misfortune happen that throws you, big family or not, onto public assistance for a time. It is quite another to expect others to subsidize the family you want to have. When you expect others to pay your way, you make it their business. I think we are now in such a sad state of affairs that perfect strangers just assume that all large families are dependent on public assistance.
I have also seen other cases where couples seriously jeopardize the mother's physical and mental health in pursuit of a large family. I think such instances unfortunately add to the stigma many people feel toward large families.
The problem with families these days is that they see children as an expense, not the cheap source of labor that they are (and traditionally have been).
We have a 13 month old daughter (best thing that has ever happend to me). I've told my wife that with 2 more we can open a Nike Factory in our basement.
Just kidding...sorda