A local policeman was parked in front of a well known establishment watching the customers walk out of the door when a man literally stumbled out of the door and sat on the steps.
He watched as the man stood uncertainly and made his way to a row of cars. He dropped his keys and fell to his knees as he attempted to pick them up. He then tried to unlock two very different looking vehicles before sucessfully opening one and slumping into the seat. The policeman continued to watch the man as he turned on his windshield wipers, turned them off, started the car, turned on the wipers again, turned them off, turned on the headlights, attempted to start the already running car then put the car into reverse. The car backed slowly out of the parking place, then proceeded somewhat uncertainly through the parking lot onto the highway.
The policeman pulled onto the highway right behind the man, and immediately turned on the blue lights. He then approached the driver and asked for his id and registration and inquired if the driver had been drinking. The driver produced his dirvers license, registration and stated that no, he had not had a drink all night. The incredulous policeman asked the driver if he would mind taking the breathalizer which the driver agreed to do. The driver did indeed blow a flat zero which the policeman could hardly believe.
When he asked the driver what in the world was going on back in the parking lot, the man smiled and said "I'm the DD tonight, the designated decoy!"
An oldy but a goody!
The cops around here would have taken him to the hospital for a blood test for drugs.
Imagine hearing a witness tell this in a courtroom" " Officer Pinket, knew John was drunk and watched John get in his car and drive off. Officer Pinket followed him for about a tenth of a mile when suddenly John swerved into the oncoming lane and ran head on into an oncoming car, killing the mother and two of her three daughters in the car. Had officer Pinket stopped john from leaving the parking lot John, the mother and her two daughters would be alive today."
I love that joke.....I was going to post it until I saw you had done the work for me.....