I'm not condemning anyone. I'm just telling the truth. God's Word concerning salvation is plain enough for anyone to read and understand. How diffucult is it to interpret plain statements like, 'There is none who does good, no, not even one?' (Romans 3:10). Likewise, 'No one comes to the Father except through Me' (John 14:6).
The Bible lays it out - heaven and hell are the only two final destinations to choose from. Those who identify themselves with Jesus Christ receive salvation of their souls, and thus permanently change their eternal destination to heaven. Those who reject Him remain as they always were - lost, and living a life that is moving inexorably toward eternal damnation.
Stating these basic facts and looking at the indicators of a person's life is not condemning them, it is simply reality.
Giving us the fast food version upon the death of someone puts an ugly face on Christianity. You do come off as condemning someone, regardless of your protestations. It's cruel, especially to the loved ones left behind.