Exactly. I'm on the same course as you are (sadly, with more than 697 days to retirement!). Take a look at my post #24 for a frightening look at the median family finances. They're not pretty, and they're light years away from the preparation my husband and I have done.
We also have not needed high-end everything; we decided to stay in our house and do some remodeling rather than just "move up" to something fancier. We've never lived up to our income.
You said, "you can tell by the way they seem to fear the subject, and blame it on things beyond their control." I've experienced this in conversation, and I've seen it right here on this thread with people claiming they can't save for retirement because they have to pay into Social Security! Talk about excuses.
Although many X-ers are now going for the McMansion thing, it was definitely a Boomer invention. I live in a typical (small, semi tacky) typical post war house favored by the parents of the Boomers. It is like a different planet from where most Boomers live.