The whole point is, most of us don't behave in a way to have our asses hauled in. (BTW: They'd need a truck for mine, thank you very much.)
Mam, I'm sure You have the cutest little behind, but many times even the best of us is ass-hauled, often in the middle of the night, with a few cocktails under the west, and NOT looking morning-fresh if you get my point ;)
Happened to a friend of mine, but he's a lawyer now...