Kick Me, I'm a Democrat (sniff, sniff, have Kleenex handy)

Slate ^ | Jan. 29, 2006 | Michael Kinsley

[Lorianne]

It seems to be time once again to play Kick the Democrats. Everyone can play, including Democrats. The rules are simple. When Republicans lose elections, it is because they didn't get enough votes. When Democrats lose elections, it is because they have lost their principles and lost their way. Or they have kept their principles, which is an even worse mistake.

Democrats represent no one who is not actually waiting in line for a latte at a Starbucks within 150 yards of the east or west coastline. They are mired in trivial lifestyle issues like, oh, abortion and gay rights and Americans killing and dying in Iraq, while the Republicans serve up meat and potatoes for real Americans, like privatizing Social Security and making damned sure the government knows who is Googling whom in this great country. Just repeat these formulas until a Democrat has been sent into frenzies of self-flagellation, or reduced to tears.

There is always a pick-up game of Kick the Democrats going on somewhere. But something about the Alito confirmation—the pathetic and apparently surprising inability of 45 Democratic senators to stop 55 Republicans from approving anyone they want—seems to have made the game suddenly a lot more popular.

[Lurker]

Mr. Kinsley has no idea just how much I would like to kick him, or how hard I would like to do it, or just where I could like to place that kick.

L

[PittsburghAfterDark]

I thought Democrats lost elections due to "slick marketing" or that they were "stolen" from them.

Maybe Democrats lose because they can't keep their stories straight?

Just a though.

[Dallas59]

"When Democrats lose elections, it is because they have lost their principles and lost their way.."WRONG!!!

It's because the Republicans have stolen the know that!

[Dallas59]

"When Democrats lose elections, it is because they have lost their principles and lost their way..

"WRONG!!!

It's because the Republicans have stolen the know that!

My CON-puter hiccuped..

[Dallas59]

"When Democrats lose elections, it is because they have lost their principles and lost their way..

"WRONG!!!

It's because the Republicans have stolen the election.... even baby lefties and Democrats know that!

My CON-puter hiccuped.. AGAIN!

[GSlob]

Don't forget to put on the shoes with protruding spikes, somewhat medieval fashion.

[Tzimisce]

Ah, the poor guy. Dare I say my heart bleeds?

[JohnLongIsland]

liberal elitist psycho-babble at its finest, this dinosaur is convinced that living in a second class socialist society is utopia, even the la slimes threw him out the door.

[nightdriver]

Slander and libel are rights that are granted by the Constitution, according to wusses like Michael Kinsley.

[Lancey Howard]

lol

[Cementjungle]

Kick Me, I'm a Democrat

I'll be happy to.

[Lancey Howard]

"The American people would simply love living in a Euro-style, secular socialist welfare state if they would only vote to let us Democrats give them one." - - What Democrats truly believe.

[goresalooza]

In other words, Kingsley is telling his leftist freak pals: Don't stray off the plantation, don't even think about it. He must be afraid, very afraid that some of them will bow out the next elections or even GASP! vote GOP or another party.

I'm perfectly content that the leftwing radicals are in the minority and will never be allowed to govern.

[Hexenhammer]

*rubs finger and thumb together

This is me playing the worlds smallest violin.

I've spent the last few days immersed in schadenfreud.

[Allegra]

What a load.

I needed this laugh.

Democrats really are funnier when they're out of power.

[Howlin]

the pathetic and apparently surprising inability of 45 Democratic senators to stop 55 Republicans from approving anyone they want

Huh?

[coconutt2000]

Nobody invited me to the party... :-(

Kick the Democrat and Pin the Tail on the Donkey are my two favorite games.

[Howlin]

LOL!