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To: NormsRevenge; All

Norms Revenge, your initial post on this thread, brought back to mind one of my favorite jokes, which I have posted a couple of times to freepers before on threads with this similar topic, but it's one of my favorite jokes, and I tell it proudly whenever I am in the vicinity of one or more "tree- huggers". I hope you like it:

A scruffy, unshaven, underfed , backwoods looking individual is standing at the defense table with his public defender in a Florida court of of law, waiting for the judge to enter to begin the trial
for which he is charged and pleading guilty with killing a Florida panther.

Seated in the front row of the courtroom are his equally shabbily dressed and undernourished wife, and their four small children. All talking suddenly stops and everyone rises as the bailiff announces to the courtroom the arrival of the judge who is to preside over the trial. The judge tells the courtroom to be seated as he sits and begins the trial by reading the charges of the defendant to the now totally quiet court.

The judge begins;" Sir you are in this court of law today charged with the criminal offense of killing a Florida panther, which is a felony in this great state. I have carefully reviewed your past criminal history, of which you have none, and have also found out that the small monthly checks that you do receive for being physically handicaped, and no longer able to to be gainfully employed, is barely enough to sustain you and your family in the simple backwoods lifestyle that you have by nessesity have had to endure for the past decade.

"Since this is your first ever offense, I am not going to give you any jail time for this crime, but I am going to fine you for it, and small monthly payments will be taken out of your monthly check, untill the fine is totally paid.
Now before I send you to the clerk to finish your paperwork concerning this, is there anything you would like to say to this court?"

The frail man rises to his feet and replies "Yes I do your Honor. I did not kill this animal for fun or sport, I killed this animal to survive. The meat from this animal sustained my wife and family for over two weeks, and after the hide was sufficienly tanned, it was made in to small articles of clothing for my wife and four children. I did not waste this animal your Honor"

With hardly a dry eye in the courtroom, the scruffy gentleman returns to his seat. The judge replies " I believe you, but my verdict still stands. This trial is adjoured, and you can follow the bailiff to the clerks office to finish the legal paperwork, but before you do, would you please approach the bench?"

The defendant nods in the affirmative, and makes his way to the judge's bench. The judge pushes his courtroom microphone
out of sounds reach, leans over his bench, and softly but inquisitively inquires;" I'd like to ask you one question before you depart. What in the world does a Florida Panther taste like?"

The shabbily dressed gentleman raises his right hand to his scruffy beard and begins to rub it in deep thought as he ponders the judge's question, and then after a few seconds, gives the judge his reply.

"Well your Honor, that's kind of difficult question to answer you see, because it's kind of a toss-up between a bald eagle and a manatee........."


20 posted on 01/13/2006 9:30:50 PM PST by musicman
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To: Brett66

here you go. don't laugh too hard, chris already thinks I'm insane.


23 posted on 01/13/2006 9:38:12 PM PST by phoenix0468 (http://www.mylocalforum.com -- Go Speak Your Mind.)
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