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To: Fierce Allegiance

I refer to your latest discharge of plebeian verbiage; in which, you have proven, once again, that there is no such thing as unutterable nonsense. Your post is an orgy of stultifying cacophonous verbal depravity; an exercise in literary impotence, and an offense to all of good taste and decency.

It seems your fingers not only did your typing, but did your thinking too. Have you considered suing your brain for non-support? Why is it that the people with the smallest minds always have the biggest mouths? If you knew what you're talking about, you'd be dangerous. Oh well, as the late Douglas Adams said: "You live and learn. At any rate, you live."

What possessed you to think that you were capable of being entertaining or interesting to read? I bet you thought it was just coincidence that your parents had the same surnames before they married? Maybe you wouldn't read like such a pathetic loser if you weren't intellectually slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through a vat of chunky peanut butter; if your weren't so fat that all the restaurants in town have signs that say: "Maximum Occupancy: 80 Patrons OR You.", or if you didn't have a face that could scare a hungry wolf off a meat truck. No, come to think of it, you would.

Anyway, I'm not really good with fools, but a friend who is good with fools wrote something down for me. Oh, yeah, "Shut your cake-hole, stupid!"


29 posted on 01/12/2006 9:03:38 AM PST by cripplecreek (Never a minigun handy when you need one.)
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To: cripplecreek

That post is written by something so confused, it doesn't know whether to scratch its watch or wind its a$$. Your post is an orgy of stultifying cacophonous verbal depravity; an exercise in literary impotence, and an offense to all of good taste and decency.

I notice that you never let an idea interrupt the flow of your posts. Wouldn't clues have more room to fit in your head if you got rid of some of the gobbledygook in there? Anyway, who was talking to you or even taking you under consideration? How true is Stanislaw J. Lec's famous remark: "Every now and then you meet someone whose ignorance is encyclopedic."

Most repair manuals are far more interesting than you, and far less turgid to read. I'd get more pleasure from running my nostrils down a cactus, than reading another contribution from you. Maybe you wouldn't read like such a pathetic loser if you weren't intellectually slower than a herd of turtles stampeding through a vat of chunky peanut butter; if your weren't so fat that when you run, you make the CD player skip at the radio station, or if you didn't have a face that is registered as a biological weapon. No, come to think of it, you would.

In closing, I suggest the next time that you feel an urge to embarrass yourself and bore others, that you summon all your might, and resist.


43 posted on 01/12/2006 9:14:36 AM PST by razorback-bert
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To: cripplecreek

Here's an old, old, oldie, slightly modified.

Dear:

[x] Clueless Newbie [x] Lamer [ ] AOLer
[ ] Me too er [x] Perver [ ] Geek
[x] Spammer [ ] Nerd [ ] Elvis
[ ] Fed [ ] Freak [ ] Scientologist


You Are Being Flamed Because:

[ ] You posted a "test" in a newsgroup other than alt.test
[ ] You posted warez in pieces LESS than 5000 lines
[x] You spammed an answer of a spam TO THE WRONG GROUPS
[ ] You quoted an ENTIRE post in your reply
[ ] You continued a long, stupid thread
[ ] You started an off-topic thread
[ ] You posted a "YOU ALL SUCK" message
[ ] You said "me too" to something
[x] You suck
[ ] You brag about things that never happened
[x] Your sig/alias/server sucks
[ ] You made up slang then used it in a message
[ ] You posted a phone-sex ad
[ ] I don't like your tone of voice
[ ] I think you might be a DUmmie


To Repent, You Must:

[ ] Be the PR guy for Canter & Siegel
[ ] Give up your AOL account
[x] Bust up your modem with a hammer and eat it
[x] Jump into a bathtub while holding your monitor
[ ] Actually post something relevant
[ ] Read the FAQ
[ ] Be Senator Frank's love slave
[ ] Be the guest of honor in alt.flame for a month
[ ] Post your tests to alt.test


In Closing, I'd Like to Say:

[ ] Blow me
[ ] Get a life
[x] Never post again
[ ] I pity your dog
[ ] Go to hell
[ ] Yer momma's so fat/stupid/ugly that etc...
[x] Take your sh*t somewhere else
[ ] Learn to post or f*ck off
[ ] All of the above

end flame


56 posted on 01/12/2006 9:28:39 AM PST by dsc (Islamic sexual violence against women should be treated as the repressive epidemic it is.)
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To: cripplecreek

"...a face that could scare a hungry wolf off a meat truck."


I don't care where you're from, that is funny. I'll be using that line at some point in the future.


99 posted on 01/12/2006 11:34:26 AM PST by mad puppy ( The Southern border needs to be a MAJOR issue in 2006 and 2008)
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To: cripplecreek; Fierce Allegiance; BJClinton

"...I see. Well, of course, this is just the sort of blinkered philistine pig-ignorance I've come to expect from you non-creative garbage. You sit there on your loathsome spotty behinds squeezing blackheads, not caring a tinker's cuss for the struggling artist. You excrement, you whining hypocritical toadies with your colour TV sets and your Tony Jacklin golf clubs and your bleeding masonic secret handshakes. You wouldn't let me join, would you, you blackballing bastards. Well I wouldn't become a Freemason now if you went down on your lousy stinking knees and begged me..."

-- Monty Python's The Architects sketch


112 posted on 01/12/2006 1:27:30 PM PST by sully777 (Blame Canada!)
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