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To: SandRat
An old rich guy is about to die. He calls his doctor, his priest, and his lawyer into his room.

"Look, guys," he says, "I understand that there's a Bible passage somewhere that says you can't take your money with you when you die. Well, I don't care. I'm going to give each of you $25,000 in cash, and I want you to put it in my coffin at my funeral."

The funeral came and went, and the trio were having some drinks later that night, when the doctor broke down.

"Guys, I can't hold this in any longer; I didn't put the full $25,000 in the casket. I put $15,000 in the casket and donated the rest to the children's hospital."

The priest broke down next. "My hands aren't clean either. I put $10,000 in the casket and gave the rest to the orphanage."

The lawyer slammed his drink down. "I can't believe you two. I am absolutely disgusted by your dishonesty. I'll have you know that I put a check for the full amount of $25,000 in that casket!"

9 posted on 12/09/2005 5:42:15 PM PST by Gordongekko909 (I know. Let's cut his WHOLE BODY off.)
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To: Gordongekko909
Niccolo Machiavelli lies on his deathbed. A priest comes to him to offer him last rites, if only he will repent. "My son, you haven't much time. Please tell me that you renounce all the works of the devil, and I will absolve you." Machiavelli stirs but shakes his head. The priest raises his voice, commanding and imploring, "son, renouce all the works of the devil, this instant." Machiavelli opens his eyes and manages to mumble "father, this is no time to be making new enemies."
17 posted on 12/09/2005 5:52:47 PM PST by JasonC
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