Without knowing the wife personally, please reserve judgement. There was likely nothing she could have done.
A person with unmedicated bipolar disorder can be extremely difficult, illogical, unreasonable, even uncontrollable, all the while convinced that he's right and all the world around him is wrong.
I'm no proponent of the "victim" mentality of so many who try to shirk responsibility by pinning blame on others. However, in the case of mental illness, family members are often true victims.
This is personal. I know what I'm talking about. Give the gal a break.