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Why do humans prefer to have sex in privacy? Question follows a Penn couple’s flagrant display
Philadelphia Enquirer ^ | December 5, 2005 | Faye Flam

Posted on 12/06/2005 12:18:48 PM PST by billorites

If scientists from another planet were trying to understand us, our obsession with privacy during sex would make a good thesis project.

The aliens might have noticed that most humans prefer to copulate while hidden away - in our cozy bedrooms or perhaps on a desolate beach dappled with moonbeams. Much fuss ensues when someone chooses to perform mating behavior more publicly, say in a sex club, or in front of a University of Pennsylvania dormitory window.

Why, the aliens might wonder, would crowds of humans gather to watch and photograph a pair of other humans at Penn who repeatedly failed to draw their curtains before engaging in intercourse? Why were the mating pair then so distressed about attracting a slightly wider audience when pictures circulated on the Web showing their naked backsides making the beast with two backs, as Shakespeare would say.

All this happened in the wake of a scandal that started with Channel 3's secretly planting TV cameras in Philadelphia sex club Kama Sutra, outraging patrons who go there to get some privacy while they have sex in large rooms full of other people.

Both incidents open up huge anthropological and sociobiological questions. Most animals don't care whether anyone watches them mating. They neither seek out nor avoid an audience. What's with the humans?

In societies from the sands of the Kalahari to the tiniest Pacific Islands, the cultural preference is for sex in private, says Christopher Kovats-Bernat, an anthropologist at Muhlenberg College in Allentown. Where people can afford it, "we segregate off a space in the dwelling that is devoted to two things - sleeping and sex." In many parts of the world, however, the private bedroom is an unattainable luxury.

While members of Kama Sutra reportedly pay $100 for the privilege of having sex in front of other people, couples in Japan are paying to be alone. There, extended families pack into single-room apartments, so a cottage industry has sprung up to provide "love hotels," says Kovats-Bernat. These by-the-hour rentals cater mostly to married couples.

The Seriono people of Bolivia also like privacy, but they sleep in common rooms in rows of hammocks, he says. So if one couple starts having sex, the neighbors will politely turn the other way.

There's some evidence a similar practice takes place in American college dormitories (though perhaps not at Penn).

And yet, many subcultures exist in which people seek out a certain lack of privacy. In Jamaica, Kovats-Bernat said, strip clubs offer something called "freaky sex" in which men get up on stage, strip, and have sex with the dancers. Either way, we seem to care whether people are watching us or not, which makes us quite different from, say, dogs, who couldn't care less.

In his book Why Is Sex Fun?, UCLA professor and noted author Jared Diamond explains why you and your dog will never understand each other's sex lives. No self-respecting dog would need to hide while mating, he says. Dogs also refrain from sex unless the female is in her fertile phase.

According to Diamond's book, our ape relatives routinely have sex in group settings but, like dogs, only when the female is in estrus. While some promote the idea that sex is only for procreation, Diamond notes that that's much more the case with chimps and dogs, who aren't interested unless they're likely to conceive. Humans, for some reason, evolved so that men and women want to mate all month long even though women are fertile for only a few days, which are hard to identify.

Diamond connects our so-called concealed ovulation with our desire for concealed copulation and outlines a couple of theories explaining why they evolved. One suggests the urge for privacy arose because it prevents conflict and thereby encourages group cohesion needed for successful hunting and gathering.

Illustrating with a more modern example, he writes that if it were an everyday occurrence for people to go into heat, get naked and full-out copulate, say, on the office couch, we just wouldn't get that much work done.


TOPICS: News/Current Events
KEYWORDS: discoverychannelsong; moralabsolutes
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To: peacebaby

Close....

Were you there?


LOL!!!


81 posted on 12/06/2005 3:43:39 PM PST by Dashing Dasher (God made mud, God made dirt, God made boys so girls could flirt.)
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To: Dashing Dasher

er, yes I was... .


82 posted on 12/06/2005 3:44:40 PM PST by peacebaby (I'm not overwhelmed! I'm just the right amount of whelmed.)
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To: Dashing Dasher

... stuck on a Ferris Wheel...


83 posted on 12/06/2005 3:51:31 PM PST by Michael Goldsberry (Lt. Bruce C. Fryar USN 01-02-70 Laos)
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To: Michael Goldsberry; peacebaby

Good one!


;-)


I'll be thinking about that one....


84 posted on 12/06/2005 3:53:32 PM PST by Dashing Dasher (God made mud, God made dirt, God made boys so girls could flirt.)
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To: Michael Goldsberry; Dashing Dasher

On a Ferris Wheel?

the bucket rocked back and forth and back and forth and back and forth and back and forth... .

hmmmm


85 posted on 12/06/2005 3:53:43 PM PST by peacebaby (I'm not overwhelmed! I'm just the right amount of whelmed.)
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To: peacebaby; Michael Goldsberry

That one may beat mine - and even yours!

We'd have to take a vote.


86 posted on 12/06/2005 3:55:06 PM PST by Dashing Dasher (God made mud, God made dirt, God made boys so girls could flirt.)
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To: Dashing Dasher

How about a dressing room at Nordstrom's????


87 posted on 12/06/2005 3:56:32 PM PST by laney (Merry Christmas Freepers!)
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To: Dashing Dasher; wildbill

Dashing Dasher, wildbill hasn't posted public in a while...must be veeeerrry busy with those private emails.


88 posted on 12/06/2005 3:56:53 PM PST by peacebaby (I'm not overwhelmed! I'm just the right amount of whelmed.)
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To: Dashing Dasher

On the cat walk of an 80 foot billboard overlooking I-75 near dowtown Detroit...


89 posted on 12/06/2005 3:58:31 PM PST by sit-rep (If you acquire, hit it again to verify...)
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To: laney

a dressing rooom at Nordstroms?

How much did that cost you?

Forgive me: Polite folks aren;t suppose to ask how much something costs.


90 posted on 12/06/2005 3:58:37 PM PST by peacebaby (I'm not overwhelmed! I'm just the right amount of whelmed.)
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To: laney; Leapfrog; peacebaby; Jersey Republican Biker Chick

Did it sway back and forth like a stranded ferris wheel.

;-)

JRBC - head over here if you have a minute.


91 posted on 12/06/2005 3:59:01 PM PST by Dashing Dasher (God made mud, God made dirt, God made boys so girls could flirt.)
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To: billorites
Illustrating with a more modern example, he writes that if it were an everyday occurrence for people to go into heat, get naked and full-out copulate, say, on the office couch, we just wouldn't get that much work done.

Why did that cause an image of Bill Clinton to form in my mind?


92 posted on 12/06/2005 3:59:48 PM PST by FreedomCalls (It's the "Statue of Liberty," not the "Statue of Security.")
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To: sit-rep

VERY nice!!!

I'm writing a book.


93 posted on 12/06/2005 4:01:33 PM PST by Dashing Dasher (God made mud, God made dirt, God made boys so girls could flirt.)
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To: billorites
Sex in privacy? Simple survival mechanism.

There are few times when we are more vulnerable than when engaged in sexual intercourse. Unclothed, oblivious to our surroundings, plenty of noise to mask the approach of an intruder.

And it's particularly hard to have sexual contact while your back is against a wall, so you're exposed and vulnerable to being stabbed.
94 posted on 12/06/2005 4:01:38 PM PST by Dr.Zoidberg (Childrens classics updated for modern islam. "If You're Happy and You Know It, Go Kaboom!")
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To: Dr.Zoidberg

Dr. Z, me thinks you're over-analysing. :~)


95 posted on 12/06/2005 4:04:43 PM PST by peacebaby (I'm not overwhelmed! I'm just the right amount of whelmed.)
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To: peacebaby

Bought shoes forgot the price but had to try them on in private HAHA...


96 posted on 12/06/2005 4:05:19 PM PST by laney (Merry Christmas Freepers!)
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To: Dashing Dasher

writing a book? "Fifty Ways to Mate Your Lover."


97 posted on 12/06/2005 4:05:50 PM PST by peacebaby (I'm not overwhelmed! I'm just the right amount of whelmed.)
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To: billorites
making the beast with two backs, as Shakespeare would say.

HUH? Did Shakespeare say that? Cite play, act and scene please.

98 posted on 12/06/2005 4:05:53 PM PST by 19th LA Inf
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To: CommandoFrank

With the dentist or hygenist??


99 posted on 12/06/2005 4:06:27 PM PST by laney (Merry Christmas Freepers!)
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To: laney

hope you had on some footsies when you tried on those shoes, kiddo!


100 posted on 12/06/2005 4:06:46 PM PST by peacebaby (I'm not overwhelmed! I'm just the right amount of whelmed.)
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