Doesn't beat my anti-gravity, perpetual motion, faster-then-light, infinite-energy generator and kitchen appliance, which not only slices and dices, but it cures baldness, restores masculine vigor, and ... if you buy the extra attachment, it's also a time machine. I still have a few shares available for investors, but they're going fast!
I am merely the pinger! ;^)
>>>"Doesn't beat my anti-gravity, perpetual motion, faster-then-light, infinite-energy generator and kitchen appliance, which not only slices and dices, but it cures baldness, restores masculine vigor, and ... if you buy the extra attachment, it's also a time machine. I still have a few shares available for investors, but they're going fast!"<<<
BUT WAIT!!! Theres MORE!!!
Wait a minute! If it is faster than light, that means that time slows down, hence a veritable time machine. Why do I need the extra time machine attachment?