I haven't worked in kitchens or as wait staff -- but I have spent time in kitchens, scrounging free meals from friend chefs etc. and have seen stuff that would curl your hair.
People generally don't leave small tips or annoy the wait staff with unreasonable requests because the service is inherently bad. They do those things because -- very simply -- they don't know how to behave in a restaurant.
I've had friends (and they have friends) who have told me some curling-hair stories too.
To be clear, I have never "stiffed" meaning leaving no tip at all. I don't believe I've ever had service that would even make me think of it and I'm hard pressed to recall leaving even a small one.
Your tone sounded quite confrontational [of course it's difficult to say for sure when merely reading, not hearing]. But I still can't get my head around how leaving a tip that might be smaller than a waitron would want is "stealing" from them. That is rubbish. It reminds me of the old joke that goes: if you walk you save the 75-cent bus fare, but if you run behind a cab you save $10.