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I'm not sure if you're just playing around. If you really need some instructions, try these below:

LAST MINUTE TURKEY TIPS

BY Chef Eric

Did you know that the Turkey was so revered by Benjamin Franklin that he made a strong case to place it as our national bird of the United States? Can you imagine if we all had turkeys on our dollar bills?

A 15 pound turkey feeds about 10 people with a bit leftover for sandwiches the next day; (try your sandwich with stuffing and cranberry mayo). A 15 pound turkey will hold about 7 cups of stuffing

Fresh all natural Turkey’s are best but if you have a frozen one Thaw your turkey in the fridge for about 5 hours per pound or in cold water for about 1 hour per pound (make sure to change your water a few times). If you do nothing else right, make sure you get the darn thing defrosted in time!! I'm speaking from experience.

To prepare your turkey, remove giblets and neck. Rinse turkey inside and out. Dry the skin and cavity well. Fill neck and body with stuffing and pin closed with a skewer (if you have one. I always liked the stuffing roasted in a pan instead of stuffed in the bird). Or you can make both.

If you're the stove top stuffing type, cut some onions and garlic in half, sprinkle with salt, pepper and thyme (or use fresh thyme sprigs) and stuff the turkey with that just to add a bit of flavor (and make yourself feel like you've actually put some effort into the bird).

Place on a rack in a roaster and rub with butter or extra virgin olive oil (1/4 to ½ cup). Sprinkle on poultry seasoning or thyme and salt and pepper. I like to put Carrots, Onion and celery in the bottom of my roasting pan because I use that to make my sauce or (Gravy for the home cook).Use a ratio of 50%onions, 25%celery and 25%carrot; that will give your Jus or cooking liquid a nice flavor.

Cover with roaster lid (if it’s big enough) or make a tinfoil lid. Roast in a preheated 325 degree F oven for about 4 hours. Baste every ½ hour or so if you're the basting type. If you have a bigger turkey (mature hen) larger than 15 #’s you can figure 1 hour cook time for every 4#’s over 15. The professional way to tell when your turkey is done is with a food thermometer. You want 180 degree reading in the thigh with out hitting any bones. You’re turkey will come out juicy and close to perfection…..

Remove the lid (foil) and roast for another hour or until it’s a nice color. Let it stand on a platter for about 15 minutes before you carve.

Enjoy a wonderful meal and remember who makes this all possible!!!!!!!!!

2 Corinthians 9:15 Thanks be to God for his indescribable gift!

Baste every ½ hour or so if you're the basting type.

What? And he calls himself a chef? Opening the oven every half hour will let out all the heat and the oven will never get hot and will never cook the bird. Get the poison control number ready for speed dial. I may baste ours once or twice. Mainly to get the juices out for the giblet gravy and to stop any over flow into the oven. Never had a dry turkey. LOL, one year we were out at the old home place without an oven so I had to put him in the microwave. Amazingly, that was the most moist and best tasting turkey we've ever had and to this day someone still comments on it during dinner.