That is one of the reasons I refuse to ever join certain women's groups, which become veritable bitching session about one's husband. I will not listen to that. If there is an issue, a woman's first response is to address it with her husband. I am loyal first and foremost to her marriage, and she should be loyal first and foremost to her husband and he to her. Her kvetching will only make the problems worse, and by listening I am contributing to the weakening of her marriage. It has taken me way to much time to understand this.
What we forget is that as a community, we have as much responsibility to help others keep their marriages together (barring gross dysfunction such as abuse, adultery, addiction etc.) as we have to our own. We pledge that for the good of our community, not only today, but in the future. It is a call for us to see our own behavior within the context of society at large, not just to our immediate circle.
I think somewhere along the way, we forgot that marriage is not only not just about us, or our spouse or even our children, but also our neighbors, friends and fellow citizens. Because of that lack of focus, we have damaged marriage to the point that it has become little more than a sexual and financial arrangement, which makes it completely transient and mostly about instant gratification. Consequences be dammed.
So while I agree that you are without a doubt right with God and that is the most fundamental building block, I think all of us need to step back and take a long view of marriage. The trouble we are having now with marriage being challenged by leftist activists is not just an outside attack. It is an outside attack that occurred because their is such weakness in the concept of the role of marriage in our society.
I agree with what you say I really do, bUt reality does not show this, MY mother who I think is ONE INTELLIGENT WOMAN has told me stories after stories about women in the 40's and 50's who were married and put up with so much heartache, physical abuse, emotional abuse, alcoholic husbands, father's molesting there own biological daughters and the women stayed, could do NOTHING because they could not support themselves nor there children.
It happened it was just swept under the rug and you never told anyone...
THis is reality, 2 people need to be married because they have the same Values, the same principles..
Bingo -- that's it exactly -- what is missing from today's narcissistic environment. Before my recent break (after 5 generations of my family) with the Methodist church, my pastor (the 4th gay pastor in a row) was questioned during a Bible class about why our church was hiring a known adulterer about town as the construction company for restoring our sanctuary. The pastor breezily said that condemning the construction vendor's behavior was "inappropriate" -- the pastor's doctorate was in psychology. The group contained another couple of open adulterers, who were doubtless grateful for this dispensation, but as one of the dumped-spouses-with-a-child in the group, I felt completely disgusted.
Wow! You're a rarity 8-)
Very nice post.