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Stella's column: DON'T SHOOT THE MESSENGER (MEGA PROJECTILE BARFER)
Chicago Sun-Times ^ | September 20, 2005 | STELLA FOSTER SUN-TIMES COLUMNIST

Posted on 09/20/2005 5:26:32 AM PDT by Chi-townChief

DON'T SHOOT THE MESSENGER: I normally don't repeat other folks' commentaries, but Bill Maher's closing remarks Sept. 9 on his HBO show "Real Time With Bill Maher" were so interesting that I thought I would share them with my readers.

So, here it is: (AND REMEMBER, I DIDN'T SAY IT!)

"NOW, I KID, but seriously Mr. President, this job can't be fun for you anymore. There's no more money to spend -- you used up all of that. You can't start another war because you used up the army. And now, darn the luck, the rest of your term has become the Bush family nightmare: Helping poor people.

"Yeah, listen to your mom. The cupboard's bare, the credit card's maxed out and no one is speaking to you. Mission accomplished.

"Now it's time to do what you've always done best: Lose interest and walk away. Like you did with your military service and the oil company and the baseball team. It's time. Time to move on and try the next fantasy job. How about cowboy or space man?

"Now, I know what you're saying: You're saying that there's so many other things that you, as president, could involve yourself in. Please don't. I know, I know. There's a lot left to do. There's a war with Venezuela. Eliminating the sales tax on yachts. Turning the space program over to the church. And Social Security to Fannie Mae. Giving embryos the vote.

"But, sir, none of that is going to happen now. Why? Because you govern like Billy Joel drives. You've performed so poorly, I'm surprised you haven't given yourself a medal. You're a catastrophe that walks like a man. Herbert Hoover was a s----y president, but even he never conceded an entire metropolis to rising water and snakes.

"On your watch, we've lost almost all of our allies, the surplus, four airliners, two trade centers, a piece of the Pentagon and the City of New Orleans. Maybe you're just not lucky! I'm not saying you don't love this country. I'm just wondering how much worse it could be if you were on the other side.

"So, yes, God does speak to you. What he is saying is: Take a hint!"

mailto:sfoster@suntimes.com


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Editorial; News/Current Events; Politics/Elections; US: Illinois; War on Terror
KEYWORDS: bias; katrina; liberaljackass
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I get the feeling that I'm going to send this woman of vast proportions a few things that "I DIDN'T SAY."
1 posted on 09/20/2005 5:26:33 AM PDT by Chi-townChief
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To: Chi-townChief

CHICAGOLAND PING


2 posted on 09/20/2005 5:27:44 AM PDT by Chi-townChief
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To: AbsoluteJustice; Augie76; Barnacle; BeAllYouCanBe; BillyBoy; Bismarck; bourbon; cfrels; ...

CHICAGOLAND PING (2nd try)


3 posted on 09/20/2005 5:28:26 AM PDT by Chi-townChief
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To: Chi-townChief

What a disgrace. She's not worthy of the space held by Kup...


4 posted on 09/20/2005 5:32:50 AM PDT by Rutles4Ever
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To: Chi-townChief
Geez. They pay her to reprint somebody else's stuff? That would be outrageous if it were good stuff.
5 posted on 09/20/2005 5:40:31 AM PDT by prion (Yes, as a matter of fact, I AM the spelling police)
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To: Chi-townChief
Her life must really suck if she has to quote Bill Maher. And it's so typical for people like Maher to spit out their hate speech as a closing monologue. If this little rat bastard had any, he would start the show with his ignorance laced diatribe.
6 posted on 09/20/2005 5:45:11 AM PDT by Niteranger68 ("Spare the rod, spoil the liberal.")
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To: prion
Why are all you ususal suspects in here blasting the columnist?

She's quoting Bill Maher. Geesh! Buy a clue!

7 posted on 09/20/2005 5:45:40 AM PDT by DCPatriot ("It aint what you don't know that kills you. It's what you know that aint so" Theodore Sturgeon)
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To: RacerF150

Were Maher's comments supposed to be funny?? Even if I were a Bush basher I would say this "humor" was pretty lame.

So he also trashed Herbert Hoover? I'll be damned if I let Maher get away with that! ;-)


8 posted on 09/20/2005 5:57:50 AM PDT by TNCMAXQ
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To: Rutles4Ever; Chi-townChief
What a disgrace. She's not worthy of the space held by Kup...

Sure she is. Many years ago Kup carried an item about a couple of San Diego Padres who belonged to the John Birch Society. He wrote that teammates were upset because of the organization's racism. I wasn't a Bircher, but had never heard that allegation so I called Kup to ask for any evidence that JBS was racist. He wouldn't come to the phone and I ended up with Stella, who "put his column together" at the time.

She'd told him what I asked and he loudly told her to tell me that "everybody" knew the Birch Society hated blacks. Then he said the organization didn't allow blacks to join. I personally knew two blacks who did and mentioned it to Stella, who in turn told her boss that. The conversation went on in similar vein for maybe two minutes. Finally, the great man picked up the phone himself, screamed "Go look it up in the library!" and slammed the phone down.

No, Stella's worthy of following Kup.

9 posted on 09/20/2005 5:58:27 AM PDT by Mike Bates (Irish Alzheimer's victim: I only remember the grudges.)
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To: Chi-townChief

Another piece of manure from the Chicago Sun-Times, which has undergone differect ownership at leat 6 times in the last twenty five years, including Rupert Murdoch in the 1980s.


10 posted on 09/20/2005 5:58:45 AM PDT by wrathof59 ("to the Everlasting Glory of the Infantry".........Robert A Heinlein)
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To: Chi-townChief
Bill Maher.

What a complete talentless whiner. I'll bet he gets wood in his pants every time something happens to conservatives.

He's not the least bit funny. He never lets his "guests" complete a sentence. He writhes around in his chair like he peed his pants and his monologue is so bitter an one sided that even if you're a "middle of the road" type you can't bear any more than about 5 minutes of him.


By comparison, that dude who has the Dailey show or whatever the name of it is...at least he can put a smile on my face a few times during his 1/2 hour show....



sorry..
//rant over.
11 posted on 09/20/2005 5:58:52 AM PDT by taxed2death (A few billion here, a few trillion there...we're all friends right?)
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To: DCPatriot

Because she's using his comments as her opinion but then copping out by saying, "I didn't say it."


12 posted on 09/20/2005 6:04:10 AM PDT by Chi-townChief
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To: Chi-townChief
For whats it worth ~ I always try to take a minute or so to shoot off an E Mail to press people who print crap like this.
They are so full of themselves about 60% of them usually respond. They usually either Bush Bash or insinuate that I am too dumb to understand the complexities of world events LOL
13 posted on 09/20/2005 6:14:41 AM PDT by Cindy_Cin
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To: Chi-townChief

Land fill trash is a step above Bill Maher. Terrorists killed Barbara Olsen on 9-11-2001, but she probably would not have been on that plane that morning if not for Maher. He will remain forever unforgiven.


14 posted on 09/20/2005 6:15:50 AM PDT by auboy
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To: Mike Bates

Wow - did not know that.


15 posted on 09/20/2005 6:27:11 AM PDT by Rutles4Ever
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To: Chi-townChief

We don't shoot messingers, Stella, dear-we don't even shoot false prophets such as your self, delivering pure horse hockey from the lips of your wannabe apprentise god,Bill Maher. We won't even shoot your god as long as we can keep laughing at him and his inept attempts at being funny.

Bill Maher is to commedy, what Alphalpha was to singing. Forgive my blesphemy, Bill. But you know it's true.


16 posted on 09/20/2005 6:43:13 AM PDT by F.J. Mitchell (But...........Mayor,aren't those buses still not airconditioned?I'm sorry, forgive me for asking.)
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To: auboy

What did Bill know about that flight and when did he know it?


17 posted on 09/20/2005 6:45:24 AM PDT by F.J. Mitchell (But...........Mayor,aren't those buses still not airconditioned?I'm sorry, forgive me for asking.)
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To: taxed2death
Q: What do you have if Bill Maher and Jon Stewart are in a car together hurtling off a cliff?

A: The sound of countless clueless 15-year-olds saying "Oh man, that sucks dude" as they click back to MTV.

18 posted on 09/20/2005 7:05:03 AM PDT by Sender (Team Infidel USA)
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To: Chi-townChief

"On your watch, we've lost almost all of our allies, the surplus, four airliners, two trade centers, a piece of the Pentagon and the City of New Orleans."

The Mother of all "It's Bush's fault" lines.


19 posted on 09/20/2005 8:42:01 AM PDT by Rennes Templar ("The future ain't what it used to be".........Yogi Berra)
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To: Sender

That's the pleasant image I've had in a long time.


20 posted on 09/20/2005 8:53:59 AM PDT by RightWingAtheist (Bring back Modernman!)
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