"Due to the substandard construction at WTC 1 and 2, the buildings spontaneously caught fire and tumbled down. The few misguided people who claim to have seen an airliner crashing into the second tower were actually viewing an addled seagull." -- Department of Transportation, September 12, 2001.
The terrorists are now training suicide pigeons! The Pigeons are taught to flock and head for the engines of US Passenger planes! The Pigeons are promised they will receive unlimited bread crumbs and statues upon which to perch in heaven in return for their sacrifice.
Remember, you heard it hear first!