Woman in power is powerless when it comes to meeting men

http://www.mcall.com/ ^ | September 17, 2005 | Amy Alkon

[teldon30]

Dear Amy: I'd like to be in a relationship again, but I never even get asked out (unless you count frisky 85-year-olds and drunks at the corner bar). I'm a 32-year-old woman who's happy, sociable, and attractive. (I paid for college by modeling and continue to take care of myself.) I'm second-in-command at a big company, financially secure, and own a beautiful home. How can I meet men in general, and more specifically, men I'd actually want to date?

Deluxe Chopped Liver

Dear Deluxe: To scare away vampires, it takes garlic and crosses, which make ugly bulges in sleek, satin evening bags. Luckily, all you have to do to scare away men is pull out a business card that says ''senior vice president.''

''Power is the ultimate aphrodisiac,'' said Henry Kissinger. Sure it is — unless you're a woman. Research by Stephanie L. Brown and Brian P. Lewis, published in Evolution and Human Behavior (Nov. '04), seems to confirm what many lonely women at the top already know: When guys go for the woman in the boardroom, it isn't the woman running the meeting but the secretary who wheeled in the coffee and croissants before it started.

Sure, plenty of men will scamper up the corporate ladder for a one-night stand. But, according to Brown and Lewis' study, men looking for dates or relationships tend to prefer their subordinates to their colleagues or bosses. The researchers hypothesize that men evolved to want women they can control as a means of guarding against ''parental uncertainty'' — unwittingly raising kids fathered by the Neanderthal next door as their own. Brown and Lewis think this may also explain why men are suckers for ''behavioral expressions of vulnerability'' — women who act like they might not be able to make it across the street

[Nowhere Man]

Here we go again, on this eternal topic. I do not know why we spend so much time on this kind of stuff, all it tends to do is get us ticked at one another. Face it, it is a difficult world we live in today. So, it is no surprise, that what should be "normal", is no longer normal, and vice versa. As for women not being able to find men-- there are PLENTY of men out there, just salivating at the chance to go with women like the one in the beginning of this article. True, these men will just "use and abuse" these women, and mainly see them as a checkbook, and a place to sleep at night(AFTER they have bedded someone else earlier). BUT-- then some women seem to dislike the kind of men who would NOT do these kind of things, seeing them as "boring", "wusses", "too nice", "nerdy", and so on. .... and here we are.......

Hmmm, that's a good way to look at it, from the other side. There will be men out there that would like to snag this lady to be their "Sugar Mama" and just mooch off of her. I see it this way, we are presented with choices in life and when we make one choice, sometimes the other choices are not available to us depending how big the choice is. I guess this lady made such a big choice that required a lot of effort to get where she it. I am assuming that she didn't "sleep her way to the top" although I must keep that door cracked open, it is certainly possible.

It is like where if I had $1500 to blow on a high end shortwave radio or a high end VHF/UHF/SHF receiver. if I buy one, I will have to forgo the other. That is what she did in life and she is paying the price of her decision when she longs for the pathi n life she didn't take.

There is a possible alternative, using my example, I could take half the $1500 and buy a nice scanner or handheld scanner that could do 90% of what the high end VHF/UHF radio could do. I could take the other half and buy a very nice shortwave radio and have the best of both worlds. Getting back to this lady, I remember that 1970's commercial of the "super woman" who can bring home the bacon and then cook it with all the energy of the Energizer Bunny. That is pure BS, no one can do that. So in essence, if she wanted a good career and a family, she should have backed off some on the career side and invest time and effort into a man and a family as she should if she wanted parts of both worlds.

I know myself, I get into trouble on this topic but I can't help it, I just keep opening up my fat mouth (fingers and keyboard?). B-) It is sad, that we as a society have arrived at this point.

I'll drink to that. That is sad. B-(

There is a CHANCE, and albeit a SMALL one, that a new opportunity MAY be opening up for me, financially.

Great! I hope it comes true, I'll keep praying for you. Where I work at, I know they are going to teach me to scan documents into the system soon. I work in the accounts payable section.

[Publius6961]

Which is a good reason to not date women at work or belonging to any organization you want to stay with long term.

Which, I suppose, a wise person would conclude includes FR...

[tet68]

Worst thing I ever had was early season archery hunt
where I was hunting on the ground, got covered by
"seed ticks" which are about the size of this period .
Whooooooh, makes me shivver just thinking about it!!

Any way, I can't blame the mosquitos for going after you,
I'm sure your "edible parts" are quite tasty!

Hehe.

[girlangler]

I meant to say WOMAN.

But you are probably so enlightened, so smart and cool, you're probably impressed with your self.

[Dan from Michigan]

Sad to say, he'll attract more of them if he leaves it on. Ya know that is just so hard to believe but I know that there is some truth to it

Not that hard to believe. I had to turn down a few women wearing rings when I was going to college. I haven't had to do that since I moved away from there, which is good.

I don't claim to be a saint, but there's one thing I don't do, and that's wreck families.

[ChefKeith]

that having extra sugar in the tea is considered by them to be risque.

ROFLMAO, that is too funny. I can just picture this in a Monty Python skit.

[Publius6961]

Did someone say redhead??

[papertyger]

Don't thank me. IIRC, I got it from Prof. Ernest Van Der Haag, writing in The National Review many moons ago.

(course, you can give me an attaboy for recognizing profound insight when I see it ;^)

[Publius6961]

"Attaboy" duly delivered...

[papertyger]

Whoah! Extinguish yer underwear sweetie!

My wife (a blonde) tells me she's read something about body chemistry (characterized by blondeness) that the buggies find yummy.

No kidding, I've seen'em swarm after blondes and leave others in relative peace.

[Nowhere Man]

And, BTW-- I am a a happy owner(most of the tme, anyway, sometimes he can be a pain, when he throws his tantrums) of a big cat, named Tiki.



Pansy b. 8-19-1987

I have 8 cats, here is my oldest, Pansy, she turned 18 last month. She had a checkup and bloodwork done, her thyroid is a little high so she takes medicine for it, but she likes ot keep us up at night by meowing really loud. B-)

If you want to see the rest of my crew, they are here: Nowhere Man's cats.

[apackof2]

1st off dump the stupid magazine column help me garbage letters, in fact dump the whole magazine.

Don't read 'em, columns, mags or watch Oprah

2nd Get out of the office and go do something someplace you've never been before and meet people.

I just did a 5,000 mile road trip this summer out West, just me and my dog

3rd Forget the internet dating BS.

I tried it, didn't work, giving it a rest

Thanks for your comments

[apackof2]

Makes me embarrassed for my gender!

[Utilizer]

I think the Prince of Monaco might already be taken, which is a common problem with women nowadays.

You are so right.

[apackof2]

Lets just agree to disagree on this one

[Utilizer]

Lol. For Me, the tipoff is when they ask what kind of car I drive (translation: how much money do you make), to which My instant response is "You understand we are going 'dutch' here, right?" I won't even trouble to return their calls after that. What would be the point?

[Rca2000]

I don't know about you, but on planes, I tend to read, sleep, look at the scenery(outside the windows), or just relax. I have NOT gotten into any meaningful conversations, with fellow travelers, whom I will most likely not see again.

And, then there was the time, in '97, on the return trip from FL, in a BAD storm, I had to convince my sister, that we were NOT about to crash.............

[apackof2]

the tipoff is when they ask what kind of car I drive

Girls may ask that....women don't

[Utilizer]

They're not looking for a subordinate woman.......just one who's not competing with him. Don't blame them one bit.

Would that you could make pretty much every woman I have ever met with few exceptions understand this bit of enlightenment.

[apackof2]

Over here...I think you may enjoy this