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Putting off childbirth defies nature, claim doctors
Scotsman ^ | 9/16/05 | Louise Gray

Posted on 09/16/2005 5:14:37 PM PDT by Crackingham

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To: discostu

Read my next post....

IMHO, a 15 y/o female needs as much if not MORE supervision than a 5 year old. But hey, I was burnt :)


61 posted on 09/16/2005 7:05:03 PM PDT by najida (So, I said to myself -Self, I really think shrimp heads in the flower pots as compost is a bit much!)
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To: najida

I have to go. My wife just told me I have to go watch a movie with her.

She's said I've had enough "computer" today. bye.


62 posted on 09/16/2005 7:05:50 PM PDT by I got the rope
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To: GVgirl; Asfarastheeastisfromthewest...
...and by the time you're 50 you'll be a different person altogether.

Ain't that the truth. I agree that teen years are way too young. I've seen very few marriages last where the couple was barely out of their teens, even with kids that I thought were exceptionally mature. I felt that I changed and matured more as a person in a couple years in my early 20's than I did throughout all my teenage years. I also agree that we don't except enough out of young people anymore. I've been amazed what my kids could learn at such a young age when they were little. All you need is a little patience to work with them and they can become quite skillful in many areas. My aim is to have them ready to go out on their own and be responsibily self-sufficient by the time they are done with college. I don't have a problem with them living at home but it's no free ride.
63 posted on 09/16/2005 7:06:19 PM PDT by metmom (Welfare was never meant to be a career choice.)
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To: Crackingham
They're all overlooking the perfect solution. Young women should get pregnant, have the children, freeze-dry them for a decade or so, and thaw them out when their careers and savings accounts will allow.

I'm really sorry I have to put this /sarcasm tag on this post.

64 posted on 09/16/2005 7:08:24 PM PDT by GretchenM (Hooked on porn and hating it? Visit http://www.theophostic.com .)
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To: najida

Not if they've been raised to understand responsibility. That's the problem with our current world, we spend 21 years telling our youth they're too immature for responsibility then when they hit 22 we yell at them for not acting like grownup. How in the hell is anybody supposed to learn how to be a grownup when the world won't give you a chance. We should be pushing responsibility on kids from the moment they get the language skills to say it and the mobility skill to do anything, then by the time they hit 15 they'd actually have a chance to function in the real world. Your 15 y/o female needed all that supervision because that's how she'd been taught, she'd been taught she was just a stupid kid (not necessarily by you, but by the whole world) and she was tired of it and wanted t obe an adult and the only thing she knew that could get her accepted as an adult was being a mother. Can't really blame her, the world raised her to be that stupid, the world TOLD her she was that stupid and would be that stupid until further notice, she was just trying to get that further notice on her own time.


65 posted on 09/16/2005 7:13:42 PM PDT by discostu (When someone tries to kill you, you try to kill them right back)
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To: MrPiper

Looks like the end of the thread and once again, no answers as to why one would want kids. Hmmmm. Night all, have to get some sleep so as to be able to go BACK TO WORK TOMORROW!!!.


66 posted on 09/16/2005 7:15:24 PM PDT by MrPiper
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To: Tax-chick
You don't want to put it off much more than nine months, or you get really grumpy.

LOL. I beg for induction starting on my due date! (Only the last one went that far.)

67 posted on 09/16/2005 7:20:51 PM PDT by conservative cat
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To: discostu

That's just it,
no one told her anything. She was cooking, cleaning, washing etc from the time she could walk. She was treated like a mini-adult, which in some ways as not a good thing. No one told her she was stupid, in fact, she was college material (which is why we were frantic to keep her from becoming ward of the state mom #3242455).

What she lacked was patience, focus and emotional maturity. She would have been a HORRIBLE mother, as I believe 99.9% of the 15 year olds out there would be. It isn't societies fault, they really don't have the brain-- not smarts--- I'm talking understanding for it yet.... like I said, I have no problem with a 19 y/o Mom, but I have major issues with a 15 y/o Mother.

I see women having children past their teens as civilization moving forward. Not everything in the past was a good thing.


68 posted on 09/16/2005 7:21:07 PM PDT by najida (So, I said to myself -Self, I really think shrimp heads in the flower pots as compost is a bit much!)
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To: Okies love Dubya 2
We started having them in our 20s so we still have some energy to chase them

I didn't have my first until I was 33 (I believed in the marriage first; kids second way of doing it.) and it didn't take long to realize that MOTHERHOOD IS MEANT FOR YOUNGER WOMEN. Wow. By the time #3 came along, I was 37 and shot. I had to go it pretty much alone as the nearest family was over 2 hrs. away. (A mixed blessing.) It sure would have been a lot easier when I had more energy.
69 posted on 09/16/2005 7:21:09 PM PDT by metmom (Welfare was never meant to be a career choice.)
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To: Tax-chick
God bless you and your husband for your contribution to our nation. We need large families, and we need to pass on the custom of having large families by rearing children with a lot of brothers and sisters.

70 posted on 09/16/2005 7:28:13 PM PDT by William Terrell (Individuals can exist without government but government can't exist without individuals.)
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To: metmom

I just got a flyer in the mail from a local day spa. It stated that now since you have, "gotten rid of the kids in school." they could pamper mom.

I nearly puked.

I did so want to march in there and say, "Ya know, some of us actually love our kids!"


71 posted on 09/16/2005 7:29:02 PM PDT by netmilsmom (God blessed me with a wonderful husband.)
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To: najida

Interesting. My oldest (17) is really bright but emotionally and socially not as advanced, yet. She's on the selfish and lazy side but I keep trying. My 15 yr old son could move out tomorrow and run his own household. He knows how to cook and shop and do laundry and some guy type maintainance things. Same parents; different personalities. My 13 year old girl is being, well, a 13 yr. old. I consider myself fortunate that so far none of them seem interested in providing me with grandchildren, for now. I guess that there's really no way to guarantee what'll happen when the hormones start flowing.


72 posted on 09/16/2005 7:32:15 PM PDT by metmom (Welfare was never meant to be a career choice.)
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To: netmilsmom

I so agree with you on that. I never could believe it when i heard mothers sigh with relief that school was starting and now the kids would be out of their hair. In other words, they could go and spend the day shopping and going out to lunch with their friends without "interference" from the rug rats. (A term I despise.)
We have homeschooled for 12 years and people would ask, "How can you stand to have them around all day?" I couldn't believe it. On the other hand if my kids behaved like theirs, I probably wouldn't want them around either. I often felt that I wanted to give the same answer but just held my tongue.I knew it wouldn't be worth the consequences to say what I thought. Glad to know someone else thinks that way.


73 posted on 09/16/2005 7:39:27 PM PDT by metmom (Welfare was never meant to be a career choice.)
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To: najida

Yes they did, the world did. There she was able to do all those things for years and yet she couldn't get a job where she could do any of those things (under 16 can't work near anything hot enough to cook and can't lift anything more than 20 pounds, and can't work for more than a few hours a day). I knew a kid who grew up on a farm, could drive a multi-ton Cat and anything else you'd find on a farm with incredible proficiency by age 12, at age 14 1/2 he had to get a learners permit to "learn" to handle much easier cars and there was no possible way for him to get a drivers license (even though he could probably drive better than the driver's ed teacher at school) until he was 16, why, because the world says anybody under 16 is too stupid to drive a car no matter how well they can prove otherwise.

See part of the problem for kids like her is that there's a great leap backwards in the teenage years. I went through something similar, being the only child of a single mother (philandering father was shown the door) I grew up in a partnership household where I was taught to do a lot of stuff and had to because mom sure couldn't. Then I get to my teenage years, which are sold as the final "seasoning" on the way to adulthood, and find out I'm not allowed to do the things I know how to do, too young not mature enough sorry.

I agree that 99.9% of the teenagers in the western world today would be horrible mothers. But the reason they'd be horrible mothers is because our society makes them too damn stupid to be anything else. 15 year olds used to be able to be good mothers, nothing significant about the biology has changed, the only thing that's changed is how we get kids through those 15 years, we've slowed down every aspect of their intellectual and emotional development, and even the ones that for whatever reason don't get slowed down are told to halt outright by age 14 to wait for the others (the ones raised the way our current world wants kids to be "raised") to catch up.

Noy everything in the past was good, in fact most things in the past sucked ass. But one of the things that we have completely screwed up today is kids, we force feed their own immaturity on them for far far too long. God says you're an adult by 15, we should raise our kids to have the emotional maturity to handle what God's about to lay on them by the time He does. "Raising" kids to be helpless irresponsible moron until their early 20s does nothing good for anyone, and punishing the ones that actually were raised (or simply had to grow up) and making them wait for everybody else to catch up does nothing but frustrate them.


74 posted on 09/16/2005 7:45:17 PM PDT by discostu (When someone tries to kill you, you try to kill them right back)
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To: metmom

>>On the other hand if my kids behaved like theirs, I probably wouldn't want them around either. <<

Spot on!

Nothing worse than the "Look at ME!" kids. Every adult must pay attention or they freak out. Mom on the other hand has a cell phone to her ear and doesn't notice a thing.

My hubby insisted that my little one do Kindergarten this year. I HATE it. Homeschooling is not going well because of it and my older daughter and I just pine away for her for three hours.


75 posted on 09/16/2005 7:47:11 PM PDT by netmilsmom (God blessed me with a wonderful husband.)
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To: Lester Moore
One starting place is to stop treating young women, 15-19 like they are children. They are not children at that age

Yes, they are. Their bodies may say they are not but their intellectual abilities coupled with their maturity say something completely different. What an absurd thing to say.

76 posted on 09/16/2005 7:48:29 PM PDT by ShadowDancer (Stupid people make my brain sad.)
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To: discostu
I've read enough of this drivel, from people who have no idea at all about how old people were when they got married, only a little while ago and it's all dead wrong!

The very poor and royalty were betrothed and married at early ages, throughout history, but that it and even that doesn't always hold true. In the 1700s, for instance, in England, the median age for a woman to get married was 26! That age lowered slightly, over the next several 100 years, but not by all that much.

In late Victorian-early Edwardian times, girls in American didn't put their hair up ( a sign of growing up !), until they were 16. The old phrase: "SWEET 16 AND NEVER BEEN KISSED", was said for a reason...girls were still considered to be children and hence not allowed to date, until they were 16. And since menarche was 13, on average, back then, they were three years into being able to be impregnated.

Men did NOT marry until they were able to support a wife, which is one reason why grooms were often much older than their brides.

Yes, of course there are exceptions; however, even back then, 15 year old girls were not usually seen as being ready for marriage, unless there was extenuating circumstances, such as families having too many kids and this was a way of getting rid of one, there were family alliances ( one farm/property abutting another )to be made, the girl was pregnant, the girl desperately wanted to get away from home.

The reason that 15 year old girls are immature, is because FIFTEEN YEAR OLDS ARE immature and boys are worse!

Even in ancient Rome, young men were considered to be immature, until the age of 25. That's when it was thought that they would settle down, stop drinking to excess, stop gambling wildly, and take on full adult responsibilities.

In America, 21 was considered to be the age of adulthood for hundreds of years, for all. That's when one could vote and sign contracts.

For girls, from upper middle and upper class families, 18, when they made their debut/ came out into society/ were finished with formal schooling, they were of marriageable age.

The poor and lower middle class, married younger or older, for various reasons.

Yes, children as young as five used to work, but that was NOT a good thing and neither should a 15,16, 17 year old hold down a full time job, in this day and age. They shouldn't be parents either...they aren't emotionally ready for that.

Some people should NEVER be parents. They don't want children and shouldn't be forced to have any. Others couldn't cope with more than one or two children and no, it isn't "selfishness"; they can't afford them monetarily, emotionally, or both.

But yes, women who put off having children into their 40s, are waiting far too long. They are looking for physical problems as well as emotional ones, for themselves and their offspring.

77 posted on 09/16/2005 7:49:18 PM PDT by nopardons
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To: najida

"Burnt" or not, you're correct! :-)


78 posted on 09/16/2005 7:51:16 PM PDT by nopardons
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To: MrPiper

Some people obviously don't need to have children, it would be a better world if people just didn't reproduce for stupid reasons.


79 posted on 09/16/2005 7:54:43 PM PDT by mel
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To: nopardons

Hear hear


80 posted on 09/16/2005 7:56:07 PM PDT by blueminnesota
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