[HairOfTheDog]

I don't know what it means when women say "too nice". I'm old and wise enough now that "nice" is vital to me. If I were ever to have said the words "too nice" it might mean "milquetoast" or "effeminate" - more estrogen than testosterone.... and truthfully, women aren't attracted to jerks, as some think. They may go after guys who turn out to be jerks, but it's not the jerkiness that attracts us. It's the confidence and masculinity. That side of jerks that doesn't take crap from anyone also attracts the part of women who want that on our side. If they can turn that outwards and not toward me, they're OK. Unfortunately, sometimes we find, they are jerks without discrimination about who's down range.

[Mr. Jeeves]

They may go after guys who turn out to be jerks, but it's not the jerkiness that attracts us. It's the confidence and masculinity. That side of jerks that doesn't take crap from anyone also attracts the part of women who want that on our side.

You got it! A+! With the additional fine point that women really want men who won't take any crap from them either, and who will pass that test when put to it. "Nice guys" crumble when a woman gives them crap, and usually either try to beg or buy their way back into the woman's affections - which just annoys her further. Judging by some of the posts on FR, there are men who have been married for decades who are still begging and buying domestic tranquility. Their wives must be ready to throw them down a well by now. ;)

[Lazamataz]

It's the confidence and masculinity. That side of jerks that doesn't take crap from anyone also attracts the part of women who want that on our side. If they can turn that outwards and not toward me, they're OK.

Bingo. You just nailed what a bad boy is.