perfect...
Posted on 08/09/2005 10:51:53 AM PDT by Mrs. Don-o
In practice, NFP couples testify that periodic abstinence typically leads to greater unselfishness. The spouses devote theselves to finding different ways of expressing love other than intercourse, during those few (5-7) days per month when they are abstaining to avoid pregnancy.
It can become a "courtship" period within marriage: a little writing an intimate poem about desire and longing, a little watching a movie and retiring perhaps to separate beds, a little romance and smooching, a little deliberate thought about "What will really show him how much I love him?" "What would really make her smile?"
And, naturally, a lot of special excitement --- spurred and heightened by all that anticipation --- when they come together again.
NFP has its stresses, and it had its rewards. I've often heard couples say it adds a real depth of meaning to their sexual relations. I've never heard anybody say it made sex seem shallow and boring, which is the case with so many couples who do not practice any sort of abstinence. And boredom with sex --- dwindling of pleasure and loss of meaning --- is what leads to the death of many a contraceptive marriage.
Then they got married for the wrong reasons.
It's not "lack of blessings" that is the issue. It is the outright refusal to be blessed, the undertaking of physical and chemical contraptions in order to avoid being "blessed."
Why would somebody try so hard to avoid being "blessed"?
SD
Uhhh--physical deformations that make pregnancy a life-and-death issue? Don't tell me how rare they are--this is from personal experience.
Bump for a later read (I'm still at work...).
If you don't mind my asking --- and if you don't mind telling: (1) Calendar or Sympto-thermal? (2)Were you trying to achieve, or to avoid pregnancy? (You can do it either way with NFP) (3) Your kids: all in all, are they a plus or a minus to your family and your life?
Again like I said, I'm not prying. But I'm always interested in honest experience.
I think it's far worse. But you know what they say about opinions.
I reckon that cause them people are having a hard time finding time to get any sex so they are grateful for the few days they can.
Between the 5 to 7 of being fertile and the 5 to 7 of flowing ( cause we all know what God said about flowing women and that uncleanlyness...STAY AWAY!) there ain't much left to work with. It'd feel like a new toy to me also with all that down time. lol
But this is not the case with most people. If I grant that for some people, pregnancy can be life threatening, and contraceptives are allowed because they are "self-defense," this still leaves open the vast majority of people who are not in life-or-death circumstances.
How can they consider something to be a "blessing" but not desire it? Isn't that a contradiction?
SD
Thank you for the honest assessment.
SD
It was 17 years ago when I started having babies, the calendar was about all there was or all we knew of. While my Catholic husband insisted I practice NFP he then used the old he wasn't getting enough so he screwed around alibi.
I agree this is not the case for most people. I'm not arguing for most people
That said--do you agree the speaking in tongues is a blessing? The chance to talk in front of thousands of people to preach the Word? The chance to minister medically to 3rd-world people while evangelizing? Going door-to-door telling people about Christ? Dancing for the Lord? Being in the military to spread the word to Iraqis? etc? etc? etc?
My point is that not everyone can have, or wants, every blessing that the Lord gives out. I know quite a few people who should not have had children (IMHO) due to their horrendous parenting skills. I also know quite a few others who should have more because that is where their gifts lie.
NFP is fine. I have no argument with it. The problem I have is the adherents who believe that everyone must conform to it or they're sinning. My initial point of this thread was that NFP is not appropriate 100% of the time for 100% of the population.
Ping for later.
That can happen. BUt it doesn't have to. Something else can happen instead: he can start looking at his own wife as something more than an in-home amenity for sexual convenience. (If that's the way he was tempted to think of her: I'm not imputing anything here.)
It can cause him to appreciate her more, to look at her under a different aspect, to think of her emotional balance with more understanding and delicacy; to become less demanding and more oriented toward patience, kindness --- in fact, all the fruits and gifts of the Holy Spirit.
I hardly think this can be done successfully without prayer and reliance on the Holy Spirit. Of course there are virtuous agnostics and atheists (hello, you, out there!) but from what I've seen, God draws people toward NFP and NFP draws them toward God.
"What if we changed that sentence to read:
"Rejection of another person's ability to walk is a rejection of a part of their humanity, whether or not this is our intent.
Wouldn't it be the same thing? How about:
Rejection of another person's tanning capacities is a rejection of a part of their humanity, whether or not this is our intent.
Would you stand by your claim when applied to other areas of life?"
We should be happy with whatever blessings God bestows upon us, and not act to actively thwart them. The contraceptive mentality distorts relationships in three ways: it supports instant gratification versus discipline, it fosters a "have my cake and eat it too" attitude, and it encourages illicit sexual behavior by unmarried (and married) people.
SD
Celery! Celery is very important!
Intentional childlessness is not a sin. Who said it was?
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