I think "The Arkansas Power Mad Jerkoffs" has a nice ring to it. Maybe a bit too assertive.
Just remembered another one that's gona have to go "The United States Naval Academy Midshippersons".
Or, perhaps a disclaimer on every piece of paper from University of Arkansas, something like:
To Whom It May Concern:
The University of Arkansas wishes to clarify certain matters that may have come to the attention of our students, our alumni, and unfortunately also the press.
First, everyone should be assured that our University's adoption of our mascot, the razorback hog, has absolutely no reference to those individuals of such genetic ill luck that they must either shave or wax their respective backs every week or so.
Second, it would be both inappropriate and inaccurate for anyone to make any assumption that our adoption of the razorback hog as our University's mascot represents in any way the University's opinion about the relative appearance of the University's allegedly female graduate students, particularly those engaged in the fields of sociology and any other of our University's graduate-level disciplines ending in the word ''Studies''.
Third, while the University's mascot is indeed a species of pig, and thus when cooked properly (recipe follows) constitutes 'pork', I want to take this opportunity to assure our students, our faculty, our alumni, any PETA a$$holes in the vicinity, and every radical 'vegan' who might ever travel into our fair state, that the University never has, and NEVER will, seek its pork by slaughtering a razorback. We are well aware, and intend to remain so, wherefrom our pork originates. ''Whoo, pig, sooo-eee'', our various athletic teams' famous cheer, does not refer to any porcine creature or species, but rather to our supporters around our state, sometimes called taxpayers. It is entirely natural and normal that our University students embrace this cheer as heartily as they have done for many decades, and doubtless will do for many decades more. After all, only a very few of our University students are taxpayers.
Thank you for your kind attention today. Any member of our University staff will be pleased to answer any further questions you may have regarding our University mascot, between 5:00 and 8:00 p.m. tonight, at the ground-breaking ceremony for our University's new Barbeque Hall.