That's okay; just wait a few years, and "developmentally disabled" will be the "derogatory" phrase, as a new, more PC term takes its place.
Retard is just the shorthand for the next to last previously favored phrase, "mentally retarded", which was replaced by mentally disabled, which has been replaced by "developmentally disabled".
The current phrase for any "difference" or handicap becomes derogatory as soon as "less judgmental" and "less prejudicial" "non-stigmatizing" phrase comes along.
Works the same way with racial epithets, too. Today's slur is yesterday's accepted term; and, today's accepted term is tomorrow's slur.
A lot of "bigots' are just plain people who haven't kept up to date on pop-culture terminology...they still call a spade a shovel.
For some reason, it's always seemed to me that it is still acceptable to talk about the "mentally retarded" but the word "retard" is more offensive and insensitive. One could say "a retarded man was injured at the fair" and few would be offended, but if one said "a retard was injured at the fair" it would strike many as insensitive and rude.
< Retard is just the shorthand for the next to last previously favored phrase, "mentally retarded", >
I disagree. I find "mentally retarded" and "retarded" acceptable. We all used those years ago in polite conversation. I still use them and I get the evil eye for it. I hate being PC.
"Retard", however, is used to make fun of the mentally retarded. "Retard" is used to hurt. There is a difference.