[martin_fierro]

A local police officer in Kazan reported the case to authorities, leading to an invitation to the girl to appear on a Moscow talk show.

"What's on the top of a house?"

                    "ROOF!"

"Who's the greatest ballplayer of all time?"

                    "RUTH!"

"How would you describe sandpaper?"

                    "RUFF!"

[doug from upland]

Here's the version I like.

A guy takes his dog to see a talent agent to try to get signed. He tells him that he has a talking dog. The agent tells him to get out, but after pleading, he agrees to give him 30 seconds.

The guy asks his dog to say the place where you don't want to hit your golf ball. "Ruff," the dog responds. The agent gets up to throw him out, but the guy pleads again for a few more seconds.

He asks the dog what keeps the rain from coming into the living room. "Roof," the dog responds. The agent grabs him by the collar and dranks him toward the door, but the guy pleads for one more chance.

He asks the dog the name of the greatest baseball player ever. "Ruth," says the dog. That was it. The agent threw them out the door.

As they were dejectedly walking away, the dog says, "Maybe I should have said DiMaggio."

[Tijeras_Slim]

I went out with a girl raised by dogs... in a cocktail dress she looked quite fetching.

[r9etb]

"What ... I shoulda said Dimaggio?"