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You're right, I know, about the cost, particularly since it's an evening wedding, presumably with dinner.

But I resent that we still have to get a gift, simply because she graced us with an invitation. Phooey. Duty gifts are as dreary as duty attendance. For my wedding, it wasn't about recieving presents, I just wanted people to have a good time.

I honestly wanted to tell people not to bring a gift to my wedding. Many FReeper friends were traveling to our wedding at great expense, so I didn't want anyone feeling they were compelled to bring a present on top of that. So many people sent nice things even if they weren't coming, and I appreciate them for it.... but I didn't ~expect~ anything. I resent people who do expect something. We were marrying late, both having been on our own a long time. We didn't need to set up household or anything... We really didn't want a registry, thinking it pretentious, but even family requested one. We had no china or silver on it, only camping and horse related stuff :~D

Now, on the other hand, I was maid of honor for a prissy wedding of my oldest friend, and I had spent more on the satin parade float dress I had to wear to hers than I spent for my own wedding dress. Money I didn't have and she knew it. I didn't buy her a gift, and I am sure she noticed and resents it, but really, her wedding, situated 60 miles away at some stuffy location with hotel, had cost us enough.

I think I was kind to not make all my girlfriends to that. I wanted them to enjoy being at my wedding, not strap them into uncomfortable undergarments and a frilly dress. I had only one bridesmaid, the same friend who had made me endure hers. At least she got to pick a beach-casual sundress to wear that cost $20.