Why Women Must Change Too if we are to Rescue Marriage

The Financial Times ^ | July 5, 2005 | Richard Tomkins

[SilentServiceCPOWife]

I also told him about all of the work you've done on your house and he was impressed.

If you start getting flirtatious messages from a submarine sailor, please let me know. ;-)

[MrNatural]

...the He-Man Woman Haters Club...

(groan) You're not going to post that picture are you?

[najida]

What picture? ;)

[najida]

Tell him thank you,
And also tell him he's got a great thing at home...

'sides, I'm old, mean, fat and crazy ;)

[SilentServiceCPOWife]

LOL No, I'm not.

Seriously, I like men. And I don't hold the entire gender responsible for an individual's behavior. I just expect the same in return.

[MrNatural]

..I'm old, mean, fat and crazy ..

Huh? Are the pictures on your site 30 tears old? have you put on 30 pounds since they were taken?

[najida]

Ahhh, thanks!

To answer,
2 year old pics and no weight gained (I think...would ja believe I don't have a set of scales !?!)

[SilentServiceCPOWife]

Tell him thank you,
And also tell him he's got a great thing at home...

Thank you. :-)

'sides, I'm old, mean, fat and crazy ;)

Oh, I thought I was talking to najida. I guess I was wrong. ;-)

[Melas]

You live in the sticks, I live in the big city.

Dallas is the sticks? We're the 8th largest city in the United States, which is in itself deceptive as we're the 5th largest metro-area in the USA behind only New York, L.A., Chicago, and Philly. I hardly live in the sticks.

Beyond dating, I've seen more than a dozen marriages fail due to women changing

I've noticed that it's always the women who're screwing things up in your post. I think even the most casual contemplation of relationships would yield a red flag over this one.

Like most of my best friends, I've experienced that my entire life, whether I was making 6 figures or unemployed. I had a girlfriend of 2 years who turned down Playboy. Any man with player skills, a sense of humor and some looks is surrounded by women, regardless of money. These are all things a man can perfect, if he puts an effort into it.

Curiouser and Curiouser. If everyone you know is so good with women, why are you witnessing so many relationship woes? The ideas here aren't jiving. Unless of course it has something to with the whole "player" mentality as indicated by your use of the phrase "player skills" isn't condusive to long term relationships? Maybe, just maybe, you're watching all of your friends' relationships fail because they aren't particularly good at maintaining long term relationships themselves? Maybe just maybe, they're responsible for 50% or more of these relationship woes?

Nonsense. Looks, youth and charm will get you in most any woman's door. As for longevity, no money no honey. They sell their goods to the highest bidder in the long run.

Utter Bravo Sierra. You're projecting. You in essence believe all women are whores, so you invent scenarios (like the one above) where all women are whores.

If you've read my previous posts, I caught on to the games early, and have only dated Latinas for 14 years now. Lots of them. They're all women, none of this dishonest, selfish feminist attitude. If they start to americanize, I move on.

Oh trust me, I've noticed that you're not in a real relationship, yet continue to dish out marital advice. That especially hasn't been lost on me at all. I've noticed from your posts, that despite your self-proclaimed trade up to Latinas, you've still yet to make a relationship work. Unfortunately, plenty of blind men without a clue have probably read the pablum and willing allowed their blind selves to be led by the blind.

[Bon mots]

Hmmm... almost 1000 posts.

Lots of whining on this thread too!

Glad I put on my flameproof suit first.

[fortunecookie]

Higher educated/higher paid women of the future will need men to cook and clean for them.

Yep, the new 'equality'. Somehow the work won't be demeaning for men, cuz, you know, for the feminazis out there, men are pretty much useless anyway. (not my opinion...)

[T. Jefferson]

Telling someone their firsthand experiences over 20 years never occurred unless viewed through your own prism of thinking is quite an achievement. Word parsing to make petty, inaccurate analysis to make yourself feel better about your life is yet another. There are many adjectives to describe this attitude, and none are complimentary. Whatever floats your boat. You sound exactly like alot of US women I know : )

I'm happily single, and my best friends are as well. Four to six months a year I travel throughout CA and So. A fishing, golfing, windsurfing, exploring etc. The relationships I enjoy are exactly what I choose, and they're very healthy, warm, long distance, and part-time. I prefer the latin culture, their women, and their attitude towards men, and plan on moving down here. People's lives, preferences and views will often differ from your own. The fact you put them down, get defensive and make wild, false commentary should tell you alot you about yourself. Funny stuff.

[MrNatural]

You miss the point of a guy like the Happy Bachelor you've just been posting to: he is not interested in having a family, i.e. children. Given that point of view, all he needs a woman for is sex and other fun.

When he's tired of the girl or she starts to talk about commitment, he moves on. From his point of view, that makes sense.

Men who want families, on the other hand, need the entire woman, and will make the necessary commitment. For us, that is what makes sense.

It's all about the old Spanish saying about life: Take what you want, and pay for it, says God

[Melas]

I'm happily single, and my best friends are as well. Four to six months a year I travel throughout CA and So. A fishing, golfing, windsurfing, exploring etc. The relationships I enjoy are exactly what I choose, and they're very healthy, warm, long distance, and part-time. I prefer the latin culture, their women, and their attitude towards men, and plan on moving down here. People's lives, preferences and views will often differ from your own. The fact you put them down, get defensive and make wild, false commentary should tell you alot you about yourself. Funny stuff.

Contraire, I'm not putting you down. I'm putting things into perspective. I'd say you're probably damned near expert at wooing South American girls and getting you what you want out of them. I give credit where credit is due. I'm sure "The Hedonist", which I gather that you authored is full of useful information, provided hot sex with South American women and prostitutes is what you're after. I'm not even putting that pursuit down (but I should) thus far.

However, you've spent a great deal of this thread commenting on marriage and long term relationships. Areas in which I won't give you credit for much expertise. In short, you simply don't know a damned thing about marriage or being married.

I don't claim to know jack about being a rich playboy windsurfing in Argentina. I'll leave that to you. I do however know what it's like to be in the room when your children are born. I know what it's like to rush to the hospital in a blind panic because your wife has rolled her car and the ER nurse wouldn't tell you about her conditition over the phone. I know what it's like to pace the halls of a hospital with that same wife because the child of that union is having surgery. I know what it's like to go shopping with your wife, for your first grandchild. Even still, I look at people way past my own age, who've been married much longer than I've been married, and I realize that I don't even come close to knowing what they know about marriage.

You might be some kind of expert on "dating" if that's what you call it, but giving credit where credit is due, I know things about marriage and committment that your mind hasn't even begun to comprehend, and my experiences with marriage are meager compared to some. Just checked, this thread was about marriage. A subject you know nothing about, despite thinking you know everything about it. Sad really.

[Melas]

No matter how that last posts reads, my wife and I didn't buy a grandchild on a shopping trip. Just wanted to clear that up.

[Nowhere Man]

In my own life, I have ALWAYS known the "real value of money", since I have had to make my own, since I was a teen. So, I have NOT had the luxury, to EVER say to someone" cost is not an issue", and instead, tend to look for the best deal, for the things I purchase. For example, I have several stereo systems, and many separate pieces of stereo equipment around my house and storage areas, BUT, in virtually EVERY case, I paid a few cents on the dollar, for them, BY LOOKING A LITLE, such as finding things on sale, on-line, at sales, auctions, flea markets, and so on, and getting non-working electronic things, and fixing them, for little of nothing.Some will look at this and say"Ewwwww... I would NEVER lower myself, to get a (fill in the blank) that another person owned, or to buy a used car, house, tv, stereo, Air conditioner, etc, I am too GOOD for that, i'll just buy new!! well, that kind of attitude is foolish and dumb. Fox example, I have a small air conditioner, i use in my room. Someone was throwing it away, in 97 , IIRC, and I got it. Nothing wrong with it, they were moving out, and did not want to take it along. It works very well , easing the burden on the Central A/C, and hence the electric bill. To me, this seems logical, but Rich folks look down on people who have to make do, with other peoples "left-overs" .

Well said. Also if something still works it can be made to work with some work, why should it tossed? This is one thing I actually agree with the greenies on to where I think we have become too wasteful as a society. Yes, I know the old saying from the Bible, "ashes to ashes, dust to dust," applies to objects as well as human, plant and animal bodies so there will be a time when something is so shot, it can't be fixed anymore, but most of the time, things could be brought back to service.

I'm in the same boat as you, someday if my ship comes in and I make 60K, 60K would be very rich to me, although it would be chump change to another.

I know myself, I do give a home to old electronic equipment (and cats too, I have eight cats), a lot of times for nothing. My father didn't want his 1963/64 Sony Tapecorder 600 and Sherwood stereo amp anymore so I have it. It is quite useful, plus if I use the 3.75 IPS setting and a long reel, I can tape a whole show of Rush, Hannity, Art Bell, Savage, etc., if I wanted to. KDKA is 85 years old this year and I like to tape the tribute and old clips they play when and if theyh ave it so it will come out again. I do have some reels of tape my parents used to tape off the TV in the 1960's, I have the "This is Barbara" (Streisand) CBS TV special from 1965 and a Frank Sinatra TV special from November of 1968.

Other stuff I have gotten was a Panasonic RA-6500 cassette and AM/FM stereo, 1970's vintage (there was an 8-Track version made too, the RA-6600 IIRC), a JVC JIL-S100 stereo receiver (1973 vintage), an FM only radio from KLH Laboratories called the KLH-21 (1967) that I use when I'm down in the cellar and want to listen to some Michael Savage. I still watch the same TV I did when I was in 10th grade in high school, a 1982 Zenith System 3 and would like to get my 1970 Zenith Chromacolor back into service. I still use my grandfather's 1953 Philco radio, I even saw a pic of my mother listening to it as she did her homework at that time. B-) Other things I like to score is old transistor radios, the crown jewel is a Magnavox 8-Transistor AM only radio from circa 1965 that I use a lot.

If you want a real trooper when it comes to this stuff, there is an amateur radio operator in his 90's (born in 1914) who I see driving around and he still yaks on the ham radio and drives at the same time. Last time he bought a new car was a 1964 Rambler American that he still drives to this day. I know someone else who drives a 1971 Ford LTD from when it was new and still drives it today.

I know what scarcity is, so like you, it drives me nuts when people think you have to have the newest things. My aunt is like that, she had to have the best in everything such as a color TV, a roundie, in the early 1960's, I think it could have been a CTC-14 from RCA. I have no problem with buying the newest and latest if you can afford it without going into dangerous debt and the family is fed and sheltered. I think that touches on the problems we have in society to when people get into trouble by trying to "keep up with the Joneses" by buying the latest things and getting into financial trouble. HDTV to me is not a lot different from the 1982 Zenith I watch, then again, it still has an excellent picture, although I plead guilty to being terminally nearsighted (-6 to -7 diopters). B-) I've also seen excellent picture quality on some of the old "roundies" too. 60K a year to me would be like Bill Gates. B-)

Everytime this comes up, I keep thinking of Polaraman's (on Audio Karma) story of picking up a 1989/90 vintage RCA ColorTrak put out to trash to fix up and when he got it home, it worked perfectly even though it was going to be tossed. Something is wrong with this picture, we are too wasteful as a society.

[MensRightsActivist]

I forget the name of that female Senator or Rep from CO who supported every man-hating, gender feminist piece of legislation that came along. She was a Dem, but is thankfully out of office now.

There are over 700 hundred women's studies prgrams on college campuses across America with thousands, or tens of thousands of virulently misandrist classes, preaching and indoctrinating our young students (mostly females). If you want to hear the likes of Susan Fauldi, Andrea Dworkin, Catherine MacKinnon, Wilma ManKiller (that's really her name) take one of those women's studies courses, our children are.

[Melas]

Pat Schroeder.

[Kelly_2000]

To lighten the mood:

WOMEN'S ASS SIZE STUDY

There is a new study out about women and how they feel about their asses!

We thought the results were pretty interesting:

85% of women think their ass is too fat...

10% of women think their ass is too skinny...

The other 5% say that they don't care; they love him, he's a good man, and they would have married him anyway.

[Bon mots]

WOMEN'S ASS SIZE STUDY