Friday, July 1, 2005
IT'S
INTERNATIONAL SUPPORT
FREE REPUBLIC DAY! !!!!
They drool when you're cool!
Click the pic!
Sagittarius, really!
Time heals all wounds, yes. But that's not really intended to mean that you should tie Time magazine around your sprained ankle. It's a figure of speech, you see, not meant to be taken literally. I have heard, however, that Newsweek is good for gout.
Today you'll start a new rock group, named "SPAM Catapult", and kick things off with a really smokin' number combining the best aspects of reggae, rap, and polka.
Noodle day, today! Have you tried some of those new "fresh" tomato-basil linguine? Of course not. But today, you will!
Big career move today! Oddly, your decision will be somehow related to a pamphlet called "Goat Herding Made Easy."
Ian McHarg once said, "Man is a blind, witless, anthropocentric clod who inflicts lesions upon the earth." You will come up with a brilliant rebuttal to this, soon. You will say: "I know you are, but what am I?"
Today may fail to live up to your expectations, but remember: it's what it's not that makes it what it is.
Today you will happen upon a prediction by Nostradamus which will scare the living daylights out of you. As well it should, although how a medieval seer foresaw your exact name is anybody's guess.
Your relatives may try to have you committed, today. Luckily, through a series of amusing misadventures, they will fail. You and your large invisible friend will simply shrug it off, of course, since it's not in your disposition to hold a grudge, and you both donate to Free Republic.
A very pudgy cat will annoy you, today.
Today you will notice yet another large freshly-dug mound of dirt in your neighbor's back yard. It's probably nothing -- he probably just digs at night if he can't get to sleep. I know I do.
You're having trouble getting your elderly relatives to pay attention to you. Have you tried talking with a Scandinavian accent and using a soap bubble machine? That, and accordion music, always do the trick for me.
Bad day to call someone a "whiney gen-x cybercowboy." After the FReepathon's better, for that one. |