[scott7278]

Jake: Bob, we loved playing here tonight. My brother's writing out an American Express travellers cheque to cover the extensive bar tab.
Bob: Well, I sure would appreciate it.
Jake: I'd better check up, see how he's doing, see I have to sign it too. I usually sit in the car and write it out on the glove compartment lid. Okay?

 

 

[HowlinglyMind-BendingAbsurdity]

Jake has some amazingly creative ideas about what you can pull with a pack of cigarettes:

Jake: ...Jacob Stein, American Federation of Musicians, Union local 200. I've been sent here to see if you gentlemen are carrying your permits.

Tucker: Our what?

Jake: Your union cards. May I see your cards please?

Tucker: Suppose we ain't got no union cards and we go in there and start playing anyway. Now what you gonna do about that? You gonna stop us, Stein? You're gonna look pretty funny trying to eat corn on the cob with no f-ing teeth!

Jake: Listen, let me talk to Bob, the owner, see if we can put your band on contract waivers for tonight. I don't want you to move from this spot. Just let me handle this.

Elwood: We'll...uh.. we'll talk to Bob.

[HowlinglyMind-BendingAbsurdity]

Head Nazi (Henry Gibson) : Gruppenfuhrer?

Gruppenfuhrer: Yes sir?

Head Nazi: Gruppenfuhrer, get that car’s license plate number. We're gonna kill that son of a bitch.