I'm guessing your friend migrated to the US a long time ago - it's not quite like that anymore.
1. There are indeed affirmative action programs which give preferences to lower caste people in *government jobs*. Private sector can hire whoever they like. (Of course until 15 years ago, the private sector was pretty insignificant, so nobody cared).
2. The Government does run a lot of infrastructure, but that is changing and being privatized (or atleast, private competition is being allowed). The telephone service is, in fact, one of the greatest success stories of this process. No more bribes or waiting for a phone. I remember being a kid in the 80s though, when your friend's description was pretty accurate. Other sectors are following..
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Oh, and the "brain drain" phenomenon of educated professionals leaving the country has more to do with education than caste. If you are educated enough and good enough to be able to get a job in the US, then many such people leave. It's a coincidence that they happen to be high caste.
Of course, it is *not* a coincidence that a hugely disproportionate number of high caste people get a much better education than lower caste people - that's the advantage of history.