"It never ceases to amaze me how home-schooling parents consistently demand that they should get MY money back in THEIR pocket"
I would never consider a refund, too many strings would be attached to it.
You just hit on something that many people don't seem to realize. If you take my money, and spend it on some aspect of your life, I get a say in that aspect of your life. Want my money for your children's education? I get some control over that education. Want my money to rebuild your house after a disaster? I get some control over how that house is built. If people don't like my ideas, or my decisions, they shouldn't take my money.