I don't see this having much to do with modern western feminism. There aren't any comparable customs in Western Culture. Western world feminists aren't notable in their criticism of such practices - emphasis on 'notable' - while I am certain many of them find it as deplorable a custom as I do, they aren't at the vanguard at all about publicizing and combating this type of stuff.
Why are females so hated (or is it feared?) in Africa and the Middle East?
An adolescent view of sex and sexuality most likely, and not so much hatred or fear or women necessarily (though the worldview might certainly lead some to hatred and fear). The idea that a non-virgin bride is somehow permanently spoiled, for example, is something most westerners have tossed away quite a while ago.
The fear of being cuckolded and replaced by a superior male is also likely a big motivator - it takes a certain kind of whacked-out mentality to place a cheating spouse on the same moral tier as a murderer or thief, for example. For some, the penalty for adultery is death - that's just crazy and has been wholly rejected by the West and again, has been rejected for a while.
I think Muslim males have a problem - chest pounding and exhortations about 'being a man' aside, I think they tend to exhibit many of the qualities of a chronic victim: always an excuse for sub-par performance, and exerting the little power they do have to absurd lengths.
"whacked-out mentality to place a cheating spouse on the same moral tier as a murderer or thief"
Hey, a guy will sacrifice his entire life, and even sacrifice his life, for his own childen. When a woman tells a man that he is the father of another man's child, she *is* stealing from him, and in a particularly despicable and damaging way.
That's one thing a woman can do to a man that a man can't do to a woman...unless it's Gracie Allen, maybe.